


i told the stars about you

by loverman



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Abusive Parents, Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic, Break Up, Catra (She-Ra) Needs a Hug, Codependency, Eventual Happy Ending, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Friends to Lovers to Rivals, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Jealousy, Kissing, Lesbian Disaster Adora (She-Ra), Lesbian Disaster Catra (She-Ra), Making Out, Marriage Proposal, Rivals to Lovers, Shadow Weaver | Light Spinner (She-Ra)'s A+ Parenting, Stars, Teen Romance, friends to lovers to rivals to friends to lovers, its modern in the sense that they have phones and diners and stuff, lmfao that tag, the horde doesn't exist in this fic, these tags are in no particular order btw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-29
Updated: 2020-07-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:07:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 30,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25589602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loverman/pseuds/loverman
Summary: Lying in Adora’s bed, arms wrapped around one another, legs tangled underneath the covers, dreamy smiles playing on both their faces, it had always been commonplace for them, even after those few years they’d spent apart. Catra couldn’t help the delicate way her fingers weaved through Adora’s hair, couldn’t help the whispered musings that escaped her lips, the sweet nothings that she whispered to her girl in the dead of the night, she couldn’t stop herself from pressing featherlight kiss after featherlight kiss to the flush of Adora’s cheek, the curl of her ear, or the small, almost insignificant wrinkle in her temple as her face slowly began to relax against the sensation of Catra’s lips against her skin. Catra had always known her girl was beautiful, but in the lowlight of the evening Adora was absolutely breathtaking. Her hushed breaths, the slight twinkle in her eye, the way the corners of her mouth turned up so gently to form a smile so fragile, so remarkable, so beautiful that Catra was afraid any sudden movement, any sudden sound would wipe it from existence forever. She made a mental note to never forget this moment, to capture this version of Adora in her mind and never let her fade.
Relationships: Adora & Catra (She-Ra), Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 29
Kudos: 330





	i told the stars about you

**Author's Note:**

> this took 3 days to write plus another day to edit and it's the longest (most agonizing) thing I've ever written so i hope you enjoy at least some parts of it

There was an infinite number of stars in the sky every night, though, she quickly learned that she was the only who could actually see them. She thought they were beautiful, something special that was meant only for her eyes. So, from the moment she mentioned them to her caregiver, who gave her an odd look and informed her that she’d never heard of stars, never seen them, essentially had no knowledge of what they were, Adora decided to keep them to herself. If she was the only one who could see them, then so be it. She was simply luckier than most.

Her caregiver, foster mother, whatever you wanted to call her, Light Hope, simply passed it off as being something from the child’s vivid imagination, opting to move on from the topic and offer the girl some dinner instead.

But Adora knew. She knew stars were real, she knew they were there, shimmering high up in the sky, lighting the way for all the citizens of Etheria even if no one else could acknowledge their presence; they were there, guiding them, looking out for them, protecting them. Lying on the grass, staring up at the stars quickly became her favorite activity. She tended to wander off into the woods late at night, giving her caregiver anxiety attack after anxiety attack as she worried over the whereabouts of the young blonde. No matter how many different tactics Light Hope had tried to keep Adora safe at home, the young girl somehow always found her way out, always found her way back to the woods near their home, waiting for the moment when the stars would shine their brightest.

When she was finally found that first night, the first night she felt compelled to go out there and stare up at them, (and scolded for leaving in the first place) she told Light Hope the stars had led her out there. The older woman had rolled her eyes, pulled Adora into her arms, and had taken her back home, much to the girl’s dismay. Regardless of the woman’s disapproval, Adora continued to follow the stars out to the clearing in the woods whenever she had the chance.

She never knew her parents; she was found by Light Hope when she was a newborn and the woman raised her to the best of her capability. She kept a roof over her head, put food on her plate (mostly vegetables, which Adora wasn’t a huge fan of, but accepted regardless when she found out they’d keep her strong and healthy) and when she was old enough, she sent her off to school. She did tend to scold Adora often, she would tell her off for even the smallest error, never allowing the child to misbehave, never allowing her to make mistakes that she would ultimately learn from and outgrow, but Adora didn’t seem to mind (or rather, she simply didn’t seem to notice). She quickly learned that the woman just wanted what was best for her, and how could she be mad at someone who only had her best interest at heart? Adora was a good kid, running away to stargaze almost every night aside, and she wanted nothing more than to make Light Hope proud.

But this story isn’t about Adora’s relationship with her foster mother, no, this story is about Adora, the stars, and a girl she met, one night, in the woods.

She remembers it so vividly; it was a memory that was constantly replaying in the back of her mind. She was six, she had snuck out once again to stare up at the stars in all their beauty, she was lying across the grass as always, hands resting beneath her head, body relaxed, eyes filled with that same childish wonderment. When suddenly she felt a kick to the side of her head and saw a blur of colors stumbling to the ground beside her.

“Ouch.” She mumbled, rubbing her cheek as she sat up to check out what had hit her.

“What the hell.” The blur of colors choked out, though it was muffled as whoever was speaking seemed to have fallen face first into the grass. Adora gasped at their language; if she ever said that word, Light Hope would never let her hear the end of it. The blur of colors, who Adora could now clearly see was a young… person? Cat? Cat…girl, pushed herself up and turned to shoot a very angry looking glare at Adora. “Nice going, you made me trip.”

“What? I didn’t do anything…” Adora raised her brows at the girl, “You kicked my head.”

“No, your head hit my foot.” The catgirl looked around, “Why were you on the ground anyway?”

“I’m watching the stars.” Adora nodded her head up to the sky and then watched as the other girl looked up in curiosity, only for her face to fall.

“…There’s nothing there…” Her eyes went wide, “Shoot, how hard did I kick you if you’re seeing things that don’t even exist?”

“See, I _told_ you you’re the one who kicked me!”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever, kid.” The girl mumbled, rolling her eyes at her but not in the way Light Hope had done it. This girl rolled her eyes in a funny way, kind of exaggerated like she was joking, it made Adora giggle a little.

“I’m no kid.” Adora puffed up her chest and crossed her arms over it, giving this strange catgirl her most serious look, “I’m a big girl. And my name’s Adora.”

“Well, you shouldn’t go around telling strangers your name, Adora.” The girl didn’t give Adora her name back and Adora didn’t bother asking.

Instead, she said, “I like your eyes.” She scooted a little closer, trying to get a better look, “They’re pretty.” The catgirl’s cheeks turned a faint pink, though it was too dark for Adora to notice.

“Don’t call me that.”

“Why not?”

“Because I said so.”

Moving on from the topic, Adora then asked her, “Why were you running?” And that took the funny look from before right off the other girl’s face.

“I’m running away from home.”

“Why?”

“Because the lady that takes care of me is awful.”

“What does she do?” Adora was getting really curious, and a little concerned, too. She didn’t know this girl, but she did know that she doesn’t like seeing other people upset; it was her least favorite thing in the world, and if this girl was upset for some reason, Adora wanted to try her best to help, or at least figure out what made her feel that way.

“Bad things.” The girl shrugged and then finally stood up, “I don’t have time to sit here and talk about it, I gotta-“

“Where are you, you insolent child?!” They heard a yell come from behind some nearby trees and before either of them could process what was happening, a tall, pale woman wearing a somewhat torn up, flowing gown made her way into the small clearing they were in. She grabbed the catgirl’s wrist and harshly pulled her away and back through where she had emerged from, muttering profanities as she walked. The brunette tried to pull away, tried to push the older woman off of her but to no avail.

Adora stood there, almost frozen in shock, then as what just happened began to kick in, she made an attempt to chase after the two, calling out for them to stop, but it was too late. They were already gone, and she made her way back to her usual spot, feeling a bit upset at the situation that had just played out in front of her. Nevertheless, she lied back down on the grass, silently hoping no one else would show up to kick her head as she stared up at the stars once again.

“That was weird.” She spoke aloud, “Maybe I should tell Light Hope about it…” She let out a deep sigh, “That girl was kinda cool. She had two different colored eyes, I’ve never seen that before.” She thought about the girl some more and a part of her regretted not asking her for her name, but she decided that she didn’t need it. She could remember those eyes even without a name to assign them to.

Moments later, Light Hope found her and forced her back to the house, warning her to stop going out into the woods without permission or else she’d lock her inside her room. Adora wondered if she was serious and decided there was only one way to find out.

She was six when she first met that girl. She hoped she’d see her again soon, but as it turns out, she wouldn’t. At least not until the next year, when she was seven and they ended up in the same 2nd grade class after the strange girl had transferred to her school.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hi!” Adora grinned at her new classmate, “Do you remember me?”

The girl rose a brow at her, “Am I supposed to?” That caused Adora’s face to fall slightly, but she quickly regained her cheerful smile, not wanting to show the girl her disappointment.

“I’m Adora.” She extended a hand to shake, the girl stared down at it but made no effort to move so Adora lowered it again, “What’s your name?”

“You don’t need to know.”

“Oh, Adora, I see you’ve met our new student, Catra.” Their teacher spoke as she approached them, smiling down at the two young girls. The mention of her name had Catra groaning to herself as their teacher shifted her gaze towards her specifically, “Nice to see you making friends, already.”

Once the woman walked away, Adora turned back to Catra that same grin still on her face, “Catra, hm, that name suits you.”

“Whatever.”

“I was just about to color in this picture of a princess, do you wanna help?” Adora grabbed the sheet of paper off her desk, all but shoving it in Catra’s face in her fit of excitement.

“Not really.” But the next thing Catra knew, Adora’s hand was gently wrapped around hers and she was pulling her down onto the chair beside her own, pushing her set of coloring pencils closer to the centre of the desk so they could both reach them. Catra was a little taken back at how friendly Adora was being with her, even after she had been, well, not the nicest towards her, but she shrugged it off and reached out for a nearby picture of a cat instead, mumbling something to Adora about how she doesn’t like princesses. Adora muttered something back about how Catra can color whatever she wants, so long as they do it together. That made Catra smile a little and the next thing they knew, they were both reaching for the red pencil.

“Red’s my favorite color.” Adora told her, grinning just as wide.

“It just looks grey to me.” She shrugged, “I’m colorblind.” She could’ve sworn Adora’s eyes grew three sizes at that.

“You can’t see color? Quick! What color are my eyes?”

“They’re blue.” When she saw Adora’s confused expression, she quickly added, “I just can’t see colors like red and green because I’m part cat.”

“Oh.”

“I like the way red looks though.”

“You said it looks grey.”

“Yeah, it’s a nice shade of grey.”

“Hm.” Adora thought over Catra’s words, “Okay. Here,” She handed her the red pencil, “You can use it first.”

“But weren’t you gonna use it, princess?” Catra rose a brow at her but accepted the pencil, anyway, already starting to shade in the cat’s tail.

Adora shrugged, a blush coming over her cheeks at the newfound nickname as she watched the other girl color, “Yeah, but you’re my friend and I wanna share with you.”

Catra froze, turning to face the blonde with a little bit of shock and a little bit of excitement in her eyes, “We’re… we’re friends?”

“I wanna be friends with you…” She shrugged again, voice falling to a hopeful whisper, “Do you wanna be friends with me?”

Catra thought about it for a moment and then nodded decisively, “Yup. Here.” She handed the red pencil back to Adora, and with a grin said, “We’ll take turns.”

Something about the way Catra smiled at her made Adora’s heart burst with joy. She couldn’t quite explain it, but she quickly decided that she loved seeing Catra look happy, that she’d do anything it takes to keep her happy. After a while, their teacher had come back over and explained that they had many coloring sets in the classroom and that the two didn’t have to share just one red pencil, she even brought over a few more shades for them. However, Catra had already concluded that she enjoyed sharing with Adora and she asked the blonde if they could continue sharing the one pencil, knowing full well that it would hinder their progress on their respective pictures, but simply not caring. Adora happily agreed and declared to Catra that she enjoyed sharing with her as well.

That night, Adora made her way back out to the woods to see the stars and tell them about seeing Catra again for the first time in a year. Light Hope hadn’t been kidding about locking her in her bedroom, but Adora quickly learned how to climb out the window, not allowing anything to keep her from the stars. A part of her wished Light Hope could see the stars too because maybe then she wouldn’t try to keep Adora away from them, the other part of her enjoyed being the only one who knew they were out there.

“I saw that girl with the different colored eyes again…” She smiled to herself, “Her eyes are still very pretty. I learned that her name is Catra and her favorite color is red, just like me. She’s really, really cool.” She thought back to all the things they did in school that day and how she spent every moment sitting beside Catra, getting to know her. “I don’t know what it is but I’m very happy I met her.”

“Adora?” She heard a familiar voice come from a nearby shrub, “Adora, are you out here again? Who are you talking to?” Light Hope stepped out, looking as frustrated as ever.

“No one, just the stars.”

“Adora, how many times do I have to tell you this,” Light Hope sighed, going to help Adora back up on her feet, “There is no such thing as stars. You cannot keep sneaking out, it is unsafe. And it appears you had escaped through the window in your bedroom, have you been doing this since I locked your door?” Adora’s eyes went wide and she refused to respond, though that was enough of an answer in itself and Light Hope huffed angrily as she forced the young blonde back to the house.

Sneaking out to see the stars was still one of Adora’s favorite things to do but it started coming in second to hanging out with Catra at school. The two very quickly became inseparable; always sitting together during reading hour, helping each other in math, and sharing lunches (Well, mostly Adora was sharing her lunch with Catra, who would have an apple and a piece of toast at most). Adora declared that they were best friends, Catra made it clear that she thought that was stupid because they seemed to be each other’s only friend, and Adora decided to disregard that fact.

One other memory Adora recalls from 2nd grade was the time Catra said something that made her heart “beat, like, a million beats a second”, as she put it. They had been best friends for months at that point and were hanging out during recess, like they always did.

“I like your outfit today.” Catra had mumbled as they walked around, hand in hand.

Adora glanced down at her clothes, raising a questioning brow, “I’ve worn it before.”

“Yeah, but…” Catra shrugged and began slowly swinging their hands between them.

“But, what?” Adora wondered, keeping her eyes on Catra even though she refused to meet her gaze.

“I don’t know, you just look really nice today.” She shrugged again, “You’re really pretty.”

Adora truly thought she imagined Catra saying that, after all, the nicest thing she’d ever said to her before that was ‘Man, I hate everyone… except you, you’re alright.’ And even that sounded like it took everything out of the brunette to say. But nope, she didn’t imagine this. Catra really just called her pretty. For some reason, she felt like she couldn’t really breath right, she started feeling really self-conscious that she was breathing a little too loud and was so focused on making it sound more normal that she didn’t notice Catra finally turning to look at her.

“Adora?” She sounded slightly concerned, “You okay?”

“Oh. Um, yeah…” She feigned a smile, still having trouble calming her heartrate, “Yeah, I’m good.” Her cheeks were burning up and she silently thanked the universe that Catra wouldn’t be able to tell how hard she was blushing. “You’re really pretty, too, Catra.”

Now, Catra was the one blushing and something about it made Adora smile.

“Yeah, whatever. I don’t… I don’t like you or anything, don’t get the wrong idea.” She rolled her eyes but couldn’t seem to hide the small smile forming on her face. A moment later, the bell rang signaling the end of recess and Catra found herself silently holding Adora’s hand tighter as they walked back into class with the rest of the kids.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On Adora’s eighth birthday, she wanted nothing more than to sit and watch the stars with Catra by her side. So just this once, Light Hope granted her permission to go out into the woods, provided that she would not leave that one clearing and she would be back no more than an hour later (Adora thought it was a little redundant since she would’ve just snuck out of the house if Light Hope didn’t let her leave, but she chose to keep that to herself, opting to thank her anyway). Her birthday fell on a Saturday that year, and Catra had promised her at school on Friday that she’d show up on time to get to spend the full hour with her; Catra made a point of never breaking a promise.

She got there just mere moments after Adora had settled down on the grass, though she had a subtle look of pain in her eyes and her right cheek looked to be a little flushed. Adora furrowed her brows at her expression but didn’t say anything as Catra tackled her in a hug.

“Happy birthday.” She mumbled into her hair, holding her as close and as tight as she physically could.

“Thank you.” Adora whispered back, not letting go until her arms started cramping up. When Catra finally got off her, they moved to sit against a tree, Adora resting her head against Catra’s chest, listening to her soft heartbeat and watching the stars twinkle up above them.

“What’re you looking at?” Catra kept her eyes locked on Adora, a little bit entranced by how peaceful the blonde looked.

“Stars.” Adora glanced up at her, “I come out here to look at them almost every night. I was watching the stars that night we first met, remember?”

“No.”

Adora sat up, “You really don’t remember meeting me?”

“I remember meeting you at school.”

“But we met before that.”

“I don’t know about that, Adora, maybe you imagined it.” Catra shrugged, finally looking away from her big blue eyes to focus on the sky instead.

“Catra, it happened.”

“Well, I-“

“You said you were running away from home, remember? You told me the woman who takes care of you does bad things.” As Adora spoke Catra’s face fell and she found herself clenching her jaw trying to compose herself.

“You don’t know what you’re saying, Adora.”

“Yes, I do. It happened, Catra.”

“Stop.” Catra’s tone caught Adora slightly off guard and she found her gaze trailing down to Catra’s cheek. She held out a hand to graze the fur but Catra quickly clawed at her, forming a few scratches on the back of Adora’s hand. Catra’s eyes widened at her own actions and she gulped when she saw thin lines of blood forming, “Shoot. I… Adora, I didn’t mean to, I-“

Adora didn’t even seem to pay it much attention. “Catra, did she do something to you?”

“What? Who? No one did anything to me.” Adora didn’t buy it.

“Did she- the lady who takes care of you, did she hit you?” Catra was trembling and Adora could see the start of tears forming in her eyes. She slowly went to wipe them away, hoping Catra wouldn’t hit her hand away again, she didn’t. Knowing that Catra wasn’t going to respond, she continued speaking, as softly as she possibly could so she wouldn’t make it any worse for Catra. “I’m asking cause I know what it’s like. Hope never hit me but she raised her hand once and it looked like she was going to. She stopped, though.”

“Adora…”

“She’s not bad. I was sneaking out a lot and she was worried about me. She told me not to go but I didn’t listen.” Adora shrugged, “It was kinda my fault, y’know?”

“What? No.” Catra shook her head but kept her eyes locked on Adora’s, “Adora, it wasn’t your fault at all.”

“But-“

“No. No but’s.” Catra reached out to hold Adora’s hand, the one she had scratched, and held it in between both of her own, “It wasn’t your fault, Adora, and if she ever raises her hand like that again, I need you to tell me. Promise you’ll tell me.”

“I…” Seeing the pleading look in Catra’s eyes, Adora gave in, “Okay, I promise.”

“Good. Thank you.” Catra smiled at her and before either of them knew what was happening, she had raised Adora’s hand up to her lips and kissed the scratches she had made, almost as a silent apology.

Adora swore it made her heart stop.

They went back to their previous seating position after that, both of them a little too shy about the previous interaction to continue looking each other in the eye, but Catra allowed her gaze to linger on Adora as Adora kept her eyes on the hand that once had Catra’s lips pressed to it.

After a while, “Thanks for coming.”

Catra chuckled, “You already thanked me, idiot.”

“Yeah, but…” She thought over her words, not wanting to hit a soft spot, “It seems like it wasn’t an easy thing for you to make it down here, so I really appreciate it.” Catra stayed silent for a long while and for a moment Adora was worried she really did upset her.

But then, “You’re welcome.”

They sat in silence for a long time after that, smiles plastered on their faces, enjoying each other’s company. Eventually, Adora started pointing out stars and telling Catra about the names she’d given each one and Catra pretended like she knew what she was talking about, even though they both knew she didn’t have a clue. Adora appreciated the effort anyway.

After their hour together had passed, Catra frantically made her way back home whilst Adora took her sweet time, opting to stay a little longer to talk to the stars. She found herself unable to talk about anything other than how her heart had felt when Catra kissed her hand. When she did finally make it back home, she decided it was best to climb back in through her window rather than deal with what was most likely an irritated Light Hope, being that Adora ignored the curfew she’d set. Even in her bedroom, though, all Adora could manage to do was lie down and daydream about her time with Catra; something about it felt special somehow, even more so than all the other time they’ve spent together over the past year or so. She couldn’t exactly put her finger on it, but she knew that it was a beautiful feeling, something she wanted to cherish because she didn’t know when she’d get to feel it again. All she really knew was that being there, in her favorite spot, with nothing but Catra and the stars, it felt nice.

The two of them ended up making many more memories that year but that one remained Adora’s favorite.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When they were nine, that’s when it became really clear to Adora.

She was out in the woods, sitting atop a tree branch, looking out at everything around her, taking in all the beauty, and Catra- well, Catra _was_ the beauty that she was taking in.

Catra had snuck out to the woods to meet Adora and when she’d noticed that the blonde wasn’t there yet, she’d climbed up a tree to hide. Meanwhile, Adora had showed up and began looking around for Catra, only to be suddenly grabbed by the shoulders and pulled up onto a branch by the catgirl herself. “Hey Adora.” Catra had said with a big, goofy smile, not seeming to care that she gave the other girl the worst fright of her life. And then, they just sat there in comfortable silence.

Adora couldn’t help but stare. The brunette had recently gotten a haircut, one she’d ended up hating and attempted to hide away by keeping it in a short, messy ponytail. Adora thought she looked beautiful.

“Yeah, so then I told the kid that if he didn’t want any trouble, he’d give me the chocolate bar, and he- Why are you staring at me?”

“Wha-Huh?” Adora was so startled that she almost fell out of the tree, if not for Catra quickly grabbing her arm and steadying her. Adora’s face was flushed and her heart was all but beating out of her chest, “What?”

“You were staring.”

“I was?”

“Yup.”

“Well,” Adora swallowed hard, wracking her brain for a good excuse, “Yeah, obviously I was staring, you were telling a story.” She cleared her throat, “That’s what you do when a person’s talking, you look at them.”

“Mhmm, right, okay.” Catra chuckled, Adora couldn’t figure out what was so funny. “Anyway, as I was saying…” But once again, Adora zoned out and just watched the way Catra’s lips parted when she spoke, or how she moved her hands a lot when she told a story, or how… “You’re doing it again.”

Adora groaned, “Dude, I don’t know what you want me to tell you.”

“I want you to tell me why you keep staring at me.”

“You have a zit.”

“I have fur, I don’t get zits.”

“You have something in your teeth.”

“I flossed before I got here.”

“Do you have an answer to everything?”

Catra shrugged, “Pretty much.” She laughed, “Whatever, I’m just sayin’, if you keep looking at me like that, people might start to think you’ve got a crush on me or something, princess.” She continued to laugh and Adora… just… _Oh… my… gosh_

“Um, Adora?” Catra’s brows furrowed in concern and she waved a hand in front of Adora’s face but the blonde didn’t even flinch. “Hellooooo… Etheria to Adora, you there?”

“I… Um…” She blinked, trying to shake the recurring thought out of her mind. _Oh, my gosh. I have a crush on Catra._

“Adora, are you okay? You look like you just saw a ghost.”

“Right, right. Um, uh, right…” She gulped, nodding her head at nothing, “You, um, you were telling a story. Go on.”

“Oh. Alright, if you say so…” Catra shook her head now, trying to remember where she’d gotten to, “Yeah, so the kid gives me the chocolate bar and then…”

_I have a crush on Catra. I have a crush on Catra. I have a crush on Catra. I have a crush on Catra. I have a crush on Catra. I have a crush on Catra. I have a crush on Catra. I have a crush on Catra. I have a crush on Catra. I have a crush on Catra. I have a crush on Catra. I have a crush on Catra. I have a crush on Catra. I have a crush on Catra. I have a crush on Catra. I have a-_

Suddenly, Adora’s wondering how she’d gone nearly 3 years not knowing that she’s liked Catra since the very first moment she’d met her.

She spent the next month trying to make her feelings subside, mostly just because it was driving her crazy how fast her heart would beat, how sweaty her palms would get, and how dizzy she’d start to feel whenever she was close to Catra. If she thought her feelings for Catra were bad before, they became all the more overbearing when she actually acknowledged that that’s what they were; feelings. She had feelings for Catra. She was nine! Nine-year-olds weren’t supposed to feel things! And yet, here she was. _Feeling_ things for Catra. Her best friend. Was that allowed?

It was becoming clear to her that there was no way to calm the storm of feelings that had come rushing at her all at once.

She wondered if all nine-year-olds had feelings like this and she’d just been out of the loop until now. She wondered if _Catra_ had feelings like this. So, she decided to ask her one day.

“Then I-“

“Hey, Catra?”

“Hey, Adora.”

“Do you…”

“Do I…”

“Do you…”

Catra sighed, “Spit it out, Adora.”

“Do you have feelings?”

Catra was a little taken back, “No, I’m just a heartless monster. I don’t feel anything, ever.” The sarcasm in her tone and roll of her eyes went unappreciated by the blonde.

“I mean, like, do you ever… I don’t know, do you like anyone?” Adora wasn’t sure why she was so shy about asking the question. She figured it might be because its somewhat personal, or perhaps she really wanted Catra to say that she _likes her._

Catra shrugged, “I like you.”

Now it was Adora’s turn to be taken back.

“And, I mean, I’d hope you like me, too.”

Now she was doubly taken back.

“We’re best friends, after all.”

Oh.

Ohhh.

“No, I mean… You know.”

Catra shook her head, brows furrowed, “I really don’t.”

“I mean, like, do you like anyone… _like that?_ ” Adora asked, hurriedly glancing at the brunette.

Catra’s face relaxed a bit and she shrugged once more, mumbling, “I said what I said.”

Okay. Adora has officially never been more confused in her life. But seeing as this conversation was going nowhere, she dropped it. What the heck did that even mean? _I said what I said._ What was she supposed to take from that? She began to wonder if perhaps Catra was messing with her, if maybe she’d noticed that Adora was acting strange around her and wanted to retaliate somehow. Then she decided that Catra simply wasn’t that cruel, at least not towards Adora, anyway.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For Catra’s tenth birthday, Adora had showed up to her house. Completely unwarranted.

“Holy sh-“ Catra cut herself off, quickly walking out the door causing Adora to stumble back as well. She shut the door behind them before whisper-yelling, “Adora, what the hell are you doing here?”

“It’s your birthday.” She grinned, extending out the gift in her hands, “Happy birthday.”

“You’re not supposed to come here.” Catra looked pretty mad, Adora hadn’t expect that.

She frowned, nudging Catra with the gift box, “I have to see you on your birthday, Catra, it’s tradition.”

“Listen, if she sees you-“

“Catra!” An angry voice called from inside the house.

“Shit.” Adora flinched at the word. She was never a fan of Catra’s swearing. For a ten-year-old, she sure did swear like a sailor; Adora always assumed she got that from her foster mom, Shadow Weaver, who incidentally, sounded like she was getting closer to the front door. “Adora, you have to leave.”

“But-“

“No. Go.” She put her hands on Adora’s shoulders and began leading her away, nodding towards the box in the blonde’s hands, she added a quick, “Just give it to me at school on Monday, okay?”

“Catra, I-“

“When I call your name, you come here and listen, child!” The angry voice boomed.

“Adora, it’s fine. Please, just go.” Catra eyes were pleading and Adora hated disappointing her, so she left. Except she didn’t really leave. She waited for Catra to go back inside and then she hid in a nearby bush, listening as the angry voice from inside scolded Catra for not coming sooner.

Adora hated everything she was hearing and as much as she wanted to walk away, she couldn’t make herself do it. She simply had to wait and make sure Catra was okay.

She’s not sure what possessed her to approach the house again, or go round to the back until she could see what _looked_ to be Catra’s bedroom window, or what made her stuff the gift in her backpack so she could use both hands to climb up to the room, but that’s exactly what she did.

She peaked through the glass and knocked twice when she saw Catra, sprawled out on her bed, staring up at the ceiling with tears in her eyes. After hearing the knock, Catra’s eyes went wide and she rushed towards the window to open it for the blonde.

“Adora, what the hell are you doing?” She glanced at her bedroom door, “I’m serious, Adora, you can’t be here, this is too dangerous.”

“Um… A little help here…” Adora mumbled, still hanging from the windowsill.

“No, no, Adora, you can’t come in. If she sees you, we’re both dead.”

“Catra, you’re crying…” Catra wiped at her tears. “I had to make sure you were alright.”

“Adora, I promise you I’m okay. Please go before something happens to you.”

“I’ll go, just… Please, take your present?” She pulled herself up and into the room, finally, making a point of hurriedly pulling the present out of her bag. “I hope you like it.” She handed it to Catra and shot her a smile, then began climbing back out the window, not bothering to wait for a response as she figured it’d only make Catra more anxious if she stayed even a moment longer. Once she had made it back onto the ground, Catra looked out the window.

“Hey, Adora?” She tried her best to be loud enough for the blonde to hear her, without catching the attention of her caregiver. “Thank you.” Adora simply smiled up at her and then turned away and beginning trek home.

Adora stayed out in the woods for a long time that night. She spoke to the stars again, told them about Catra’s problem with her foster mom, about how she was mistreating her and making her cry. Adora had never met her but she’d seen her in person four years ago, that first night when she came to take Catra home. She remembers her being tall and lanky, with wrinkly pale skin… actually, her skin was less wrinkly and more so… cracked? Adora didn’t understand how that was possible but she shrugged it off. She didn’t know much about the woman, other than that she upset Catra, and anyone who made Catra sad wasn’t on good terms with her. She’d made a promise to herself to always keep Catra safe and happy, and if that woman was getting in the way of Adora’s promise… she really, really, really didn’t like her. Evidently, Catra didn’t seem to like her either, though she didn’t actually talk about her much. Adora noted very early on in their friendship that Catra preferred not to talk about her feelings; she only did so when she was forced and even then, she wasn’t happy about it. Still, Adora made a mental note to ask Catra more about the situation; she wanted to make sure her girl was okay, after all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At age eleven, Catra actually visited Adora’s house for the first time. For the few years they’d known each other, they only ever hung out at school, or the clearing in the woods. Mostly because Adora wasn’t sure if Light Hope would take a liking to Catra or not… And because Catra didn’t even really want to meet the woman after finding out how she’d treated Adora in the past. But Adora had assured her that Light Hope hadn’t done anything bad in years, that she’d actually apologized to Adora for losing her temper in the past, and that she’d made an effort to be a better parental figure, something Adora definitely appreciated. Catra was still somewhat wary of meeting the woman, having had her own experiences with bad parents, but coming over meant a lot to Adora, and Catra wanted nothing more than to make Adora happy.

So, there she was, barely managing a single knock on the door before it shot open and she was pulled into a tight hug. She froze for a moment, her cheeks flushed, wind partially knocked out of her, but then she relaxed in Adora’s arms, all but melting in her warm embrace as she let a soft purr escape her.

“Are you okay?” Adora had mumbled. Catra didn’t respond, just held her tighter and purred gently into her shoulder, something that they both found comforting in a way.

“Yeah,” Catra whispered when they pulled away, “Why?”

“No reason, just felt like checking in.” That wasn’t entirely true. Yes, Adora did make a habit out of checking in on Catra and making sure she was doing alright, however she’d also noticed a bit of a pattern; a lot of the time, when Catra would show up to the woods to meet with Adora outside of school, she’d show up with some kind bruise or scar or _something_ that looked like it hurt, and more often than not, she’d have tears in her eyes. Adora didn’t like it. She didn’t like whatever that woman was doing to Catra and she didn’t like that it was happening _because_ Catra was leaving to see Adora. It had been years of this already and every time she saw Catra looking so sad, so hurt, so _broken_ she felt like she was the one causing that pain.

Catra smiled at her, soft, loving, appreciative. “Thanks, princess.”

“Oh.” A monotone voice came from behind them, “Who is this?”

“Hey Hope, this is my friend, Catra.” Adora smiled, looking between the two, “Remember, I told you she was coming over to hang out today?”

“Ah, yes.” She nodded, “The one whose mother is always yelling.”

Adora’s eyes widened, Catra’s narrowed.

“Hope!” Adora turned back to Catra, “I’m sorry, she’s used to just speaking her mind, y’know?” Her nervous laughter didn’t help ease Catra’s irritation.

“You told her about my foster mom?”

“I-“

“Did you ever think maybe I told you all that stuff in confidence?”

“Catra-“

“Adora-“

“You two may want to stop speaking over each other.” Light Hope suggested before walking into the kitchen, leaving the two girls by the entrance of the house.

“I’m sorry I told her.” Adora spoke up first, “But she’s _my_ foster mom and I figured she might be able to help somehow.”

“Help?” Catra’s eyebrows had flown up by her hairline, “Adora, she’s just as bad as my bitch of a mom!”

“Catra!” She scolded, then took a deep breath and with a calmer tone said, “Please, stop swearing.”

“Alright, fine.” Catra rolled her eyes but complied, “But seriously. For all we know, all you did by telling her was give her new ideas for what she could do to you.”

Adora crossed her arms over her chest, “No. Listen, Hope’s better now. She’s actually making an effort to be better, for me.”

“Whatever.”

“Catra, I really don’t want us to argue today, okay?” Her gaze softened and she rested a hand on Catra’s shoulder, “It’s your first time over and I want it to be a nice memory.”

Catra let out a breath she didn’t really realize she was holding in, “Okay, okay. I want it to be nice, too.”

Adora couldn’t keep her smile from breaking out on her face, “Great, now c’mon.” She took Catra’s hand and pulled her up the stairs to her bedroom. “This is my room.”

After giving her a short tour, the two found themselves lying on Adora’s bed, cuddled up together, with nothing filling the silence between them except the sound of their breaths falling in sync. “I like this.”

“What?”

“Being here, with you.”

“I like it, too.” She looked up into mismatched eyes, “I wish you could stay forever.”

“Yeah?” Catra smirked, “You don’t think you’d get sick of me?”

Adora sat up slightly, staring at Catra with a serious look on her face, “I could never get sick of you.”

“You sure about that? I hear I can be pretty annoying.” Catra’s face fell a little as she spoke, it broke Adora’s heart.

Her brows furrowed and she kept her gaze locked on Catra’s pretty blue and yellow eyes, “I’m sure.” She rested her head back on Catra’s chest and held her closer, whispering a soft, “Whoever said you’re annoying is a dumbass.”

“Gasp. Did my Adora just say a _bad word?_ ” Catra asked, mocking tone clear in her voice, though Adora ignored it because she couldn’t seem to get past the way she’d protectively called her ‘my Adora’.

“Yes. Yes, I did.” She nodded, not that Catra could even see it. “Because no one calls you annoying and gets away with it.”

“You call me annoying, like, twice a day.” They laughed.

“Yeah, well, I’m allowed.”

“Says who?”

“It’s one of my privileges as your best friend.” Adora grins to herself but it’s cut short when they hear Light Hope calling them down for dinner.

“Yeah, whatever, idiot.” Catra laughed, sitting up and quickly pressing a kiss to Adora’s cheek, “C’mon, let’s go.” She jumped up off the bed and left the room so quickly that she didn’t even notice Adora, still lying on her bed, fingertips grazing the skin where Catra’s lips had just been, mouth agape, cheeks flushed, completely awestruck.

Even after Adora had figured out her feelings for Catra, she never wanted to be without her, never wanted to stop holding her and hugging her and showing her how much she wanted her around. It flustered her a little, sure, but it had already become second nature for them; if they were together, they’d be touching in some way or another, from holding hands as they walked, to cuddling up in comfortable silence. But this was new… sure, Catra had kissed her hand that one time (and it was so incredible it stopped Adora’s breathing for a good moment there) but this was new and different and interesting and it had butterflies fluttering around in the pit of her stomach and she had to admit, she liked the feeling.

“Adora, c’mon!”

She got up and followed the brunette down, sitting at the table with her and the older woman. She decided that she had to test something out before Catra would have to go home later. They ate in silence, with Light Hope occasionally piping in with some random comment that Catra didn’t really know how to respond to, so she had simply let Adora take the reins.

After dinner, Adora quickly grabbed Catra’s hand and pulled her towards the front door, yelling out something to Light Hope about how they were headed to the clearing in the woods. At this point, Light Hope had accepted that there was no way to actually stop Adora from going out there, instead opting to just let the girl go, so long as she informed her that she was leaving beforehand.

“What’re we doin’ out here?” Catra wondered as Adora continued to pull her along.

“I felt like going for a walk.”

“Aw but can’t we go back to your room and take a nap or something? Your bed’s comfy.”

“Maybe next time.”

Catra grumbled out a, “Fine.” But then stayed quiet.

Adora intwined their fingers as she glanced up at the sky, “Oh, it’s getting late, you can see the stars now…”

“Well, I can’t,” Catra chuckled, “Besides, I still think you made those up to trick me into thinking you have magical powers.”

“Don’t be silly, only princesses have magical powers.”

“You’re my princess, aren’t you?” Catra looked at her with soft eyes and a dazzling smile and Adora was sure she looked like a lost puppy with how she was looking back at her. She let the question go unanswered, mostly because she felt it was rhetorical, but also partially because she pretty much had the wind knocked out of her in that moment and she knew she wouldn’t be able to form a single syllable without choking.

“Anyway,” She said after a moment, once the aching feeling in her heart had faded away, “Stars are real and they’re beautiful. I really wish you could see them, too.”

“I thought you said you like being the only person who can see them.” This was true. Adora had said this many times, she’d told Catra all about the stars and how no one else seemed to be able to see them and how it made her feel special that she could.

“Yeah but it’d be nice if I could share it with you.” Adora smiled to herself, “I want you to feel special, too.”

“But if I could see them, too, you wouldn’t feel special anymore because you wouldn’t be the only one who could see them.” Catra argued, trying to word it so it wasn’t confusing.

Adora shrugged at that, “I’d still feel special because I’d have you around to enjoy the stars with me and I always feel special when you’re around.”

Catra couldn’t help the warm feeling in her cheeks, “Yeah? Why’s that?”

“Because you could be friends with anyone in the whole entire world, but you choose to be friends with me.” They shared a smile, “Kinda like the stars. They could show themselves to anyone here on Etheria, but they only do it for me. Huh… I guess you’re like my star.”

“Is that a good thing?”

“It’s the best thing you could be.”

“Well, then I’m happy to be your star.”

Adora stopped walking then, turning to look Catra in the eye, and for a moment they both just stood there, smiling at one another, feeling like they were the only two people in the world. And then Adora did something she really didn’t think she’d have the guts to do. She leant up and pressed a soft, lingering kiss to Catra’s cheek. Almost instantly she felt Catra’s face heat up below her lips and it made her heartbeat race knowing that she had made Catra just as flustered as Catra had made her.

When she pulled away, Catra had that same goofy awestruck look on her face as she gently reached up to touch her cheek, mumbling an airy, “What was that for?”

Adora shrugged, cheeks just as red, for some reason, “Returning the favor.”

Catra ended up going home soon after and Adora found herself talking to the stars the way she used to, going on and on about Catra, how wonderful she was, and how she made Adora feel, and explaining every little detail about every little thing they did that day. To Adora, the only thing better than talking to Catra was talking to the stars _about Catra._

Many cheek kisses followed after those first two, though they were reserved only for special occasions, like when Catra was looking especially pretty and Adora wanted to make sure she knew that, or when Adora said something sweet and Catra couldn’t think of a better way to show her appreciation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When they were twelve, they started finding new places to hang out when they were together; it wasn’t that Adora didn’t want Catra to visit her clearing anymore, nor that Catra didn’t enjoy pretending to stargaze while Adora actually stargazed. It was simply the fact that they were growing up and wanted to discover more of the world around them.

Adora found them a nice park near their school where they could sit and talk and play on the monkey bars if they so pleased, and Catra found them a quaint little diner that she claimed “looked like it would be easy to steal from” (Adora quickly told her off and offered to pay for their meals using the weekly allowance Light Hope began to give her – it wasn’t a lot, but it was enough for her and Catra to split a short stack of pancakes, twice a week).

They were sitting in their favorite booth in that very diner when Adora built up the courage to ask.

“Hey Catra?”

“Hey Adora.” Catra replied through a mouthful of pancake. Adora wasn’t eating much today, Catra noticed.

“Um…” She couldn’t help but eye the shiner on her friend’s face, “How’d you get the black eye?”

Catra promptly dropped her fork, her face falling as she looked Adora in the eye, “I told you not to ask me stuff like that anymore.”

“Catra, I just want to make sure you’re okay.” Adora pleaded, reaching out to hold Catra’s hand but she moved it away before she could.

“I’m fine, Adora, I’m always fine.”

Adora sighed, “Always fine isn’t good enough. Tell me what she did.”

“No.” She picked up her fork again, burying her face in her food so she wouldn’t have to look into those deep blue eyes.

“Catra-“

“Drop it, Adora.”

And she did drop it… for all of two minutes.

“Catra, how am I supposed to help you if you don’t even tell me what’s happening to you?”

“You’re not.” Catra snapped, slamming her fork down on the table now that’d she pretty much lost her appetite. The sudden harshness of her words caught Adora off guard, had a gasp escaping her lips, and she stared at Catra with something almost like fear in her eyes. “You’re not supposed to help me, Adora. It’s not your job to protect me. I can take care of myself.”

Adora couldn’t get out any words.

Catra sighed and grabbed at a napkin from the dispenser on their table, “Just let it go, okay?”

“I…” Adora swallowed hard and thought over her words, “I can’t let it go, Catra. I can’t let it go because you’re sad all the time and you’re always hurt and you’re always crying and I don’t like seeing you like this and I feel like it’s my fault because-“

“What?” Catra’s gaze softened and she looked back up to meet Adora’s eyes, “Adora, it’s not your fault.”

“But I’ve been noticing things, Catra. I’ve noticed how you always have more bruises whenever you come out to meet me, if I didn’t ask you to come hang out then she wouldn’t hit you as much.”

“No.” Catra shook her head, a determined look in her eyes, “No, Adora, it has nothing to do with you. It’s true that she doesn’t like it when I leave the house, she just wants me to stay locked up in my room forever, when I try to leave, she gets mad, but it isn’t your fault.” She slipped out of her side of the booth, making her way in next to Adora to hold her, “Please don’t blame yourself.”

Adora wasn’t sure when tears started trickling down her cheeks, but she was sure Catra had seen them. “But…”

“No. No but’s. You haven’t done anything wrong. What she does…” Catra forced herself to get the words out, “It’s… it’s bad, but you can’t stop her, and you shouldn’t blame yourself for that either. You’re just a kid, Adora, like me, there’s nothing you can do.” Adora stayed silent for a while, held Catra closer to her as she cried into her shoulder. Her tears were staining Catra’s shirt, the shirt she’d once told her was her favorite. That only made her feel more guilty, even though she knew they’d fade soon enough, even though she knew that Catra wouldn’t mind even if the stains did last forever, even though she knew the last thing Catra wanted right now was for her to feel bad about anything else.

When she finally pulled away, “It’s not yours either.”

“Hm?”

“It’s not your fault, Catra.” She spoke barely above a whisper, “What she’s doing to you, it’s not your fault, I promise. You shouldn’t blame yourself, either.” And then Catra was the one crying and Adora was doing her best to hold her close and comfort her.

After a while, their waitress came back over to make sure everything was okay, to which Adora quickly thanked her, assured her they were fine, and asked for the check. After they’d paid and left, Catra walked Adora home and Adora all but begged her to stay, to spend the night rather than go back home to that horrible woman.

“She gave you a black eye, Catra, you can’t go back there.”

“I have to, Adora, if I don’t…” She shrugged, silently willing her tears not to fall, “She might do something even worse.”

Adora’s heart was breaking at the thought of that woman laying another hand on her girl but she swallowed down that feeling and nodded, giving Catra one last hug before letting her leave.

“Wait.”

“Hm?”

Adora stepped up to Catra, took her face in both hands, and planted a soft kiss to her bruised eye, almost as a silent apology. It reminded her of the time Catra kissed her hand after scratching it. When she pulled away, Catra gave her a look that she knew all too well by now; the ‘it’s not your fault’ look, but regardless, she smiled and thanked her and then made her way back home. No, not home. That woman was not Catra’s home. Adora was. That’s one thing she knew for sure.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At thirteen, Adora made two new friends. Well, she had friends other than Catra, but she’d just never felt as close with any of them, now that she’d met Bow and Glimmer though, they started taking up a lot of her time. Glimmer was a princess with the power of teleportation, she was the Queen’s daughter and she had a bit of a tempter, she reminded Adora of Catra in that way. Bow was very friendly and very sporty and Adora quickly got very close with him because she’d always kind of wanted a brother and Bow felt just like that – he also gave great hugs, but Adora still preferred Catra’s. Speaking of Catra, she wasn’t all that fond of Adora’s two new friends, mostly because she was kind of jealous at how quickly they all got along and how much time Adora had started spending with them, not that she’d ever admit it. Regardless of her new friendships, Adora always spent most of her time with Catra because… because she was Catra, she was her girl, her favorite person on Etheria. She didn’t even have to make time because she simply always _had_ time for her.

“Bow, Glimmer, and I were gonna head down to the diner later, do you wanna come with?” They were in Adora’s room, sitting on her bed in comfortable silence, Catra had her head resting on Adora’s lap while Adora combed a hand through her shaggy brown hair.

“You’re going to our diner with _them?_ ” Adora flinched at the slight venom in her voice, thankful Catra’s eyes were shut so she didn’t notice.

“They’re our friends-“

“They’re your friends.”

“Okay, but I really think you’d like them if you got to know them. Besides, the diner’s got a special tonight. Two-for-one waffles, Bow and Glimmer can split, and you and I can split. It’ll be fun.”

“Isn’t your little princess friend rich? Can’t she afford her own waffles?” Catra sat up and rolled her eyes, startling Adora a little at the sudden movement.

“Catra.” Adora scolded, “C’mon, don’t be like that.”

Catra raised her eyebrows at her, almost in a challenge, “Like what?”

“Y’know, all grumpy and jealous and-“

She scoffed, “I’m not jealous. Like I care if she’s got money. It’s not even hers, her mom’s the queen, of course she-“

“You know I’m not talking about money.” Adora sighed and scooted closer to Catra, taking both her hands in her own, “Catra, you’re my best friend and you mean more to me than anything, but Bow and Glimmer are my friends, too, and I want you to get along with them.”

“But-“

“No. No but’s.” She mocked, smirking at the phrase Catra used on her so often, “Do this for me, okay?”

Catra looked away, feeling her cheeks warm up a little, “Yeah, fine, whatever.”

Adora leant forward, pecking Catra’s cheek quickly before jumping up off her bed, hurrying to her closet, excitedly mumbling something about picking out an outfit.

When it was time to meet Bow and Glimmer at the diner, the two walked in hand-in-hand, with Catra keeping Adora as close to her as she possibly could. They spotted the duo already seated at the bar and made their way over, watching as they stood up from the stools to greet Adora with hugs, while Catra just stood there, waiting for the whole ordeal to be over.

“Catra! So glad you could make it!” Bow all but yelled as he pulled Catra into a crushing hug, basically lifting her off the ground in the process.

“Yeah, well…” She shrugged as he set her back down, “Adora said there was gonna be waffles.” She glanced at Glimmer, who was staring at her with a raised brow, “Hey Sparkles.”

Glimmer simply shot back a quick, “Hi.” Then returned to her seat

“I like waffles, too!” Bow said, pulling the girl’s attention back to him as he grinned at her, “Way better than pancakes.”

“I know, right?” Catra gestured to Adora with her thumb, “But Adora prefers ‘em so we get them every. Single. Time.”

Adora rolled her eyes, batting Catra’s hand away, “Please. Don’t pretend like you don’t eat most of the stack and leave me with, like, half of a single pancake.” It’s true, Catra tended to eat more than her share, but Adora didn’t really mind. She knew her foster mom did a really poor job of feeding her, that’s why Adora invited Catra out to eat or over to her place for dinner whenever she had the chance. Catra pouted, making no effort to defend herself while Bow laughed at the comment and then gestured for the two of them to take a seat beside him.

The four teens sat in a line at the bar for another hour and a half, talking and laughing, and munching down waffles like their lives depended on it. And when it started getting late, they went their separate ways, with Bow walking Glimmer back to the castle, and Catra walking Adora home (Bow did offer to walk them each home first, but Catra assured him that they were okay and she was perfectly capable of getting Adora home safe on her own).

On their walk, they stopped by the woods to watch the night sky for a bit, “Did you have fun?”

“Yeah, actually, I did.” Catra sighed in defeat, “I guess sparkles and arrow boy aren’t that bad, after all.”

“See, I told you you’d like them.” Adora smiled to herself, glancing at the softened look on Catra’s face before turning back to the stars, “They really wanted you to come along, y’know.”

“Ha, sparkles looked like she was dreading the fact that I was there.”

“She can be a little rough around the edges, but she’ll soften up after a while. She didn’t like me all that much when we first met, either. I mostly got along with Bow.”

“Yeah, he seems like a really good guy.”

“Mhm, he is.”

“I’m just hoping he doesn’t replace me.” Catra tried to pass it off as a joke but Adora could hear the real worry in her words. She looked down at Catra again, this time holding her gaze.

“What? No one could ever replace you, Catra, you know that.” She shrugged, “Bow, he’s… he’s like my brother, and you...”

“What am I?”

Adora smiled again, soft and sweet, “You’re my Catra.” She thought back to when Catra had referred to her in the same way, how it felt like fireworks had gone off in her stomach, how it made her mouth go dry and her heart beat loudly in her ears, how nice it felt in the moment, to hear the words and feel as though she was Catra’s. A part of her hoped that she’d elicited the same reaction in Catra.

“I like that.” Catra smiled back at her, just as soft, just as sweet.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Catra nodded, sure of her answer, and before Adora knew what she was doing, she suddenly had her hands resting on Catra’s shoulders and she was gently pushing her until her back was against a nearby tree, and she was leaning into her and she was shutting her eyes and she was-

She was kissing Catra. Like, on the mouth. Which she’s never done before, ever. And if cheek kisses flustered her as much as they did, she can’t even imagine how she looked now that her lips were pressed up against Catra’s lips and she could feel how soft and nice they were.

When they pulled away after a moment, a long, slow, heart-stopping moment, they both just stared at each other with wide eyes and even wider smiles.

“Well… that was new.”

“Ha, yup.”

“I liked it.”

“Me too.”

Eventually, Catra made her way home, and where fear would usually be evident on her face, already thinking about what her foster mother might do when she sees her, there was nothing but pure, unadulterated happiness.

“…Did you see that?” Adora whispered up to the stars, her fingertips grazing over her lips. She let out a shaky breath, “I just kissed Catra.”

When she made it back home, she excitedly gushed to Light Hope about the experience, who happily listened and even told Adora about a woman she once fell in love with, a woman by the name of Mara who she ended up losing touch with but never stopped thinking about. The story both warmed and broke Adora’s heart and she silently hoped that that would never happen to her and Catra (she was sure it wouldn’t because they were far too important to each other to ever let something get in the way of what they had).

Along with a newfound appreciation for kissing, thirteen was the age when Catra and Adora really began coming into their own. They began picking up hobbies and figuring out what they were into, with Adora deciding that she was very much into sports and wanted to join the high school soccer team next year. Catra had an affinity for drawing but that was something she always knew; she constantly found herself doodling on her notebooks and drawing little designs on Adora’s hands. But what really caught her attention was the art of photography. She was constantly making comments to Adora about how she wished she could capture certain moments, keep them with her forever to be able to look back at whenever she wanted, it intrigued Adora, and one day when they were helping Light Hope sort some old boxes, she found something she felt Catra might be interested in.

“Here, check this out.”

“What is it?”

“It’s a memory capture machine.”

“It is called a camera.” Light Hope piped in, sorting through a box that had a bunch of old books in it, “But you are correct, it can be used to capture memories. It takes photos of whatever it is pointed towards.”

Catra looked mesmerized by the thing in her hands, “Wow…” She put it up to her eye to look through the small glass window and rested her finger atop the largest button there was, “Like this?” She pointed the camera at Adora and pressed the button, causing a flash to go off. Adora winced, rubbing her eyes, while Catra watched as a piece of film rolled out.

Hope glanced over, “Yes, like that. This one is an instant camera, it produces images instantly, hence the name.”

Catra hesitantly pulled the piece of film out and squinted her eyes at it, “It’s too dark to see anything.”

“You must wait for it to develop. Give it a moment.”

Catra sighed, rolling her eyes impatiently, “Man, for a so-called instant camera, this thing sure does take forever.”

Adora laughed, blinking her eyes a few times to adjust to the light, “You’re just impatient.”

“Well they shouldn’t call it an insta- Oh, I think it’s done!” They both peered down at the photo, laughing when it depicted a very close up photo of Adora’s face, eyes bugged out and mouth agape.

“Ew, I look awful.” Adora shook her head, “You gotta throw it away.”

“What? No way, it’s my first one ever. I gotta keep it.” She grinned, stuffing it in her pocket, “Besides, it’s a nice memory.” She returned the camera to the box Adora had found it in.

“You can keep it if you want, I’m sure Light Hope wouldn’t mind.”

“Nah, I’ll get my own someday.” Catra shrugged, passively moving to grab another box, but Adora could see how her gaze lingered on the device, how fascinated she was by it. “Now, c’mon, the sooner we finish up, the sooner we can go watch a movie.”

“Can we watch the one about the puppies in love?” Adora asked, lifting another one of the boxes and setting it on a nearby shelf.

“Nope.”

“Aw, c’mon!”

“We’re gonna watch the one with all the car wrecks.”

“But we always watch that one.” Adora pouted, “You never let me watch the puppies.”

“I’m a cat, if we watch a movie about dogs it’ll be like an epic betrayal to my people.” Catra shrugged, ignoring the adorable look Adora was giving her.

“Ugh, fiiiiine.”

Catra grinned, pleased with her win, and pressed a quick kiss to Adora’s lips, causing her to blush, “Thank you.”

That one little moment with Hope’s old camera was all it took for Adora to decide that she would do anything it takes to make sure Catra got her own, one day. She loved the way Catra’s face lit up when she held it, she loved how excited she got about the photo she took, albeit it was a horrible, blurry photo that barely showed anything other than Adora’s goofy looking face, she simply loved the idea of Catra finally getting to capture moments like she’d always talked about. So, when Catra went home later that night, Adora rummaged around in her room, trying to find an empty jar or box she could use as a piggy bank, and from that point on she began saving up most of her allowance in hopes of getting Catra a camera, even going as far as cutting back their bi-weekly pancake outings to once a week.

Years later, they ended up both getting phones that had little cameras on the back and Catra definitely took advantage of that, taking so many photos of so many beautiful things (mostly Adora) that she’d actually ended up filling its memory storage. That didn’t deter Adora, though, she continued to save up, making a silent promise to herself that she’d be able to get Catra a real camera by no later than her 16th birthday.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When they made it to high school, they became closer than ever, much to the surprise of everyone around them who was sure that the new change would push the two apart. Adora and Catra wouldn’t let it. Though, there was something new Adora did want to try…

“Hey Catra?”

“Hey Adora.”

“Can I ask you something?” They were standing by Catra’s locker as she put a few textbooks away. Catra mumbled back an affirmative, Adora continued, “How would you feel about me telling people you’re my girlfriend?”

The pencil Catra had been holding between her teeth fell to the floor and her gaze drifted up to Adora’s eyes, which had a look of hopeful curiosity in them.

Adora bit her lip, trying to contain the blush on her cheeks and the harsh beating of her heart, which she was sure could be heard from a mile away, “Cause, um… I really, _really_ want you to be my girlfriend.”

“I, uh…” Catra cleared her throat, scratching at the back of her neck, “To be honest with you, I thought I already was.”

Adora’s eyebrows flew up in pleasant surprise, “Oh.”

“Yeah, um…” She laughed nervously, “I’ve… I’ve actually been telling people you were my girlfriend for a while now.”

Adora couldn’t contain her smile, “Oh.”

“I hope that’s alright.” Catra bit her lip, seeming nervous and hesitant, though all those feelings of worry were wiped away as soon as Adora pushed her against the nearest locker and kissed her, only stopping when they were both almost entirely out of breath.

“Oh,” Catra breathed out in a whisper, “Wow. Okay. I would’ve told you we were girlfriends a lot sooner if I knew you’d do _that._ ”

Adora shook her head at her, brows furrowed, “Shut up.” And they were back to kissing again until a passing teacher told them to stop.

They began going on dates, to the park, to the diner, to the clearing in the woods; Catra always argued that they had practically been doing on dates since they were seven-year-olds, Adora insisted that these were different. They really weren’t. Well, apart from the fact that these outings consisted of a lot more kissing. It had become pretty much all they ever did, actually. But since they’d spent the first seven years of their relationship talking, Adora was just fine with spending all her time now simply kissing her girlfriend.

During their free periods, they’d head to the library, huddling up in the corner with all the old, dusty books that had long since been forgotten. Sitting with their knees pulled up to their chests, gently knocking together as they laughed uncontrollably at something the other said, hands wrapped around the other, placed on bare skin, skin that had raised with every chilling touch only to later grow warm with a delicate flush, breathing heavy and deep and reckless, not caring about how much noise they might be making because it didn’t really matter, it never did. These moments together, in the dark, quiet, peaceful part of the school library that had, at this point, become reserved for them only, thanks to the librarian who had taken a liking to the sweet couple, they were special. They cherished them more than anything, even if at times it seemed as though, perhaps, they’d taken them for granted. They never did.

Catra’s head had fallen back, resting against a bookshelf as she laughed, breathless and airy, filled with an undeniable sense of… something. Adora wasn’t sure what, but she liked it. She liked how free and happy and calm and _content_ her girlfriend looked. She liked how she looked like nothing could spoil her mood, liked how she looked all the more beautiful than ever because she’d let go of her burdens for just one brief moment, liked how her shoulders relaxed, her jaw slacked, her eyes fell adrift without so much as a second thought. She liked how she got to be a part of the moment, liked how she inadvertently caused the moment; her, being there with Catra, alone in their spot, sharing a moment of whatever the hell this was, bringing them both nothing but this overwhelming feeling of pure bliss, she loved it. She loved it so much that she couldn’t help herself and before she knew it, her fingertips were grazing Catra’s jaw, leading her gaze back on to her. Catra met Adora’s eyes, her laughter dying down almost instantly as she fell into a trance, her eyes wide, lips parted, cheeks warmer than they once were. The chilly air of the library was replaced with a sudden feeling of warmth as they held their gaze for a moment, two, three… and Adora’s mouth was on Catra’s.

Capturing that previous feeling of calm contentedness between their lips; savoring it, breathing it in, breathing each other in.

“Whoa.”

“I know.”

“Kiss me like that again.”

“Okay.” And she did.

They shared many moments similar to that one, in the library, in the woods, in Adora’s bedroom. They had their spots, sure, but the real key to moments like those was them. Them, being together, basking in one another’s company, enjoying every last second because moments like those were fleeting and they never knew when their next one might be. It didn’t make sense, it never did, because they were young, they were still so young, they had their whole lives ahead of them for moments like these, and yet it didn’t feel that way to them. And even when it did, they never wanted to rush themselves, never wanted to take those moments for granted. And so, they never did. They cherished each and every one of those moments, together.

Bow and Glimmer invited the two out to a local crafts fair in the town of Thaymore that had been going on one week, telling them that it was wonderful, lively, inspiring, filled with happy people and beautiful art, that they just had to go with them. To everyone’s surprise, Catra was the most excited to go, and while Adora was checking out some custom handmade flowerpots, Catra wandered over to a table setup with tubes of different types of paint, drawn in by the multitudes of different colors.

After noticing that the girl was missing from her side, Adora followed after her only to find her attempting to stuff a couple of tubes into her pockets, much to the blonde’s dismay.

“Catra,” She scolded, keeping her voice low so as not to get caught by the attendant, “Stop, oh, my gosh. I’ll get them for you, it’s fine.” Catra had tried to argue, not wanting to keep accepting handouts from Adora anymore. Nevertheless, the blonde persisted, insisting that it wasn’t a handout; that it could be considered a five-months-and-eleven-days-aversary present (Catra was not amused); that her just paying for it was better than stealing and getting caught and going to prison for the rest of their lives, and then somewhere between Adora dramatically acting out how Glimmer’s mom would order the royal guards to lock them up and throw away the key, and how Light Hope would only visit them in their cell to scold them every day for the rest of their lives, Catra actually gave in (if only to shut Adora up).

“Hey, do you mind if I leave these here?” They had gone back to Adora’s after the fair, “My, uh… my foster mom checks my room a lot and, I don’t know, I just…”

Adora smiled at her, soft and understanding, “Hey, it’s okay,” She held Catra’s hand, tracing circles to calm her, “You can keep them here, I understand.” Catra met her eyes, returning the smile, gentle and appreciative.

Adora ended up setting up a spot on her desk for all of Catra’s art supplies, making sure to keep it organized and ready for her whenever she wanted to come by to use them (which happened a lot, and a part of Adora was starting to think that Catra was coming over more so for the art supplies than to hang out with her), something that Catra appreciated much more than Adora realized.

She never considered herself a jealous person. That being said, Catra was hers and the girl that was clutching her arm and giggling like an idiot and fluttering her stupid eyelashes at her and trying to be cute (but was actually just being dumb) had another thing coming to her if she thought she could flirt with her girl.

They were in art class, well actually, Catra was in art class and Adora had shown up once it was over to pick her up for their date when she noticed a short redhead who couldn’t seem to take a hint. Adora waited for a moment before doing anything, standing in the corner of the, now, mostly empty classroom with her arms crossed, observing the scene playing out in front of her.

“Yeah, so, anyway, Catra,” Again with the stupid eye-fluttering-thing. God, what is this chick, some kind of butterfly? “I was hoping you could help me with our new project. I mean, you’re just such a great artist and clay is such a difficult medium, y’know?”

“Thanks, Sweetbee,” Oh, great. She’s a bee. Well jokes on her, Catra hates honey. “But I’ve actually gotta get going, I-“

“Oh?” Did her grip just tighten on Catra’s arm? Did she just… Is she… Is this really happening right now? “That’s a shame cause I’d really like to see what you can do with those hands.”

Oh.

Oh, that’s it.

“Hey Catra,” She approached her, jaw clenched, bittersweet smile playing across her face as she eyed the short redhead who couldn’t seem to let go of Catra’s arm, “Oh, hello.” Her tone was condescending and distasteful, “You know, I’d heard there was a bug going around, but you definitely aren’t what I was expecting.” A part of Adora didn’t even want to give this girl the time of day, the other part of her wanted to rip her a new one.

The girl turned her nose up at Adora, trying to size her down, but said nothing.

“Hm.” Adora turned back to Catra, “Might wanna be careful, Catra, could’ve sworn you told me you’re allergic to bees.”

“I am, actually.” Catra slid out of the girl’s grasp, moving to stand beside Adora, snaking an arm around her waist instead. They had a bit of back and forth, which mostly consisted of Sweetbee sneering at Adora and Adora heavily implying (in fact, at one point she’d just outright said it) that she’d beat the shit out of her. Eventually, the duo just walked out of the room, leaving Sweetbee speechless (even more so than she’d already been).

“You didn’t have to lay into her that hard, ya know.” Catra laughed, leaning into Adora as they walked through the halls.

“Are you kidding?” She scoffed, “I was this close to buying one of those fly zappers.” She pulled Catra even closer, protectively resting her arm over her shoulders, “I swear to God, who does she even think she is?”

“Well, she is a princess.”

“And everyone knows that’s not your type.”

Catra chuckled, “Oh, everyone knows?” Adora hummed an affirmative. “What is my type then?”

“Me, obviously.”

Catra couldn’t help but grin at that, nuzzling her head against Adora’s chest, “Mhm, obviously.” Their date that afternoon ending up consisting of Adora protectively holding Catra close to her at every possible moment (not that Catra minded), glaring at anyone who dared to even look at Catra for a moment too long (not that Catra minded), and going off for, like, an hour about how it was absurd that that “bee chick” would even attempt to flirt with Catra when everyone knows she’s Adora’s girl (not that Catra minded). If anything, Catra kind of enjoyed seeing Adora get so protective over her, she thought it was endearing, in a way. And hot. She thought it was really hot.

A lot happened that year, though.

“Don’t you have practice soon?” Catra mumbled in between kisses. They were sitting on the bleachers by the soccer field after school that day, making out, hoping no one would show up and bother them.

Adora simply pulled her closer, deepening the kiss, “Who cares?”

“I do!” They heard a voice coming from the field and separated to check out who it was.

“Bow, do ya mind?” Adora called back, nodding her head towards Catra, “Kinda in the middle of something, here.”

He chuckled, “I can see that!” then jogged up the steps till he made it over to them, “But practice is in five minutes and coach said she’d make us all do suicide drills if even one person was late, so please go get changed before she shows up.”

Adora sighed, turning to give Catra one last peck before getting up to make her way to the locker room, “I’ll see you after, yeah?”

“Actually, I gotta head home.”

“Already?” She rose a questioning brow and Catra gave her a look, subtly glancing at Bow and then back at Adora. “Hey, Bow, look, I promise I won’t be late, but would you just give us a second?”

“Sure, no problem.” He shot them both a grin as he descended the steps, heading back down to the field to do some stretches.

Adora sat back down beside Catra, taking her hands in her own and rubbing gentle circles with her thumb, a look of concern shadowing her face, “You okay?”

“Everything’s fine, Weaver just needs me to run some errands.”

“Catra, you’re lying through your teeth.” She pushed a strand of hair out of her girlfriend’s face, “Do you want me to come with you?”

“What? No, you have practice.”

“I could skip.”

She rose a sarcastic brow at her, “And get yourself kicked off the team? No, Adora, stay here, I’ll be okay.”

Adora thought it over for a moment, finally letting out a sigh of defeat, “You promise?”

“I promise.”

“Okay, fine. Call me after so I know you’re safe.” Catra nodded in response and allowed Adora to press a soft kiss her to cheek before they both got up and went their separate ways.

By the time Adora eventually made it back from the locker room in her soccer uniform, the rest of their team had showed up. “Hey again,” Bow grinned at her, “Everything okay with Catra?”

“Yeah, she’s good.” She smiled back, gently nudging his shoulder, “Thanks for checking in.”

“Of course.” He returned the nudge and then their coach showed up, already throwing around instructions like it was nobody’s busines.

Catra never called. She never called, or texted, nor did she come by Adora’s place to deliver the message, the message being that she was safe and sound, in person. So, Adora did the only thing she could think to do.

She snuck out in the middle of the night, silently praying Light Hope wouldn’t catch her and take away her… everything privileges, as made her way over to Catra’s house. She did exactly what she did on Catra’s tenth birthday, she went ‘round the back of the house, climbed up to Catra’s room and came in through the window. That’s when she saw something that broke her.

Catra was curled up in bed, tears in her eyes, hair a shriveled mess, face flushed and yet somehow also pale, arms and legs covered in more bruises and scratches and painful looking marks than Adora had ever seen on her.

“Catra…” She mumbled, mostly to herself, but it caught the other girl’s attention anyway.

Her eyes widened at the revelation but only slightly as it seemed even just that small facial movement caused her so much pain, “Adora?”

Adora swallowed, trying to stop the tears that were already forming in her eyes from spilling as she hovered above the brunette, “You promised.”

“I know,” Catra was trembling, “I know. I’m sorry.”

She had never heard those words come from Catra before. She fell to her knees beside the bed, gently pressing a hand to Catra’s reddened cheek, “You have nothing to apologize for.” She spoke in a hushed whisper, partly to avoid the woman in the other room overhearing her, but also because she felt as though speaking any louder would only hurt Catra more. She had to be gentle with her in that moment, even more so than she usually would’ve been.

They both knew she shouldn’t be in there; they knew how much trouble they’d both be in if she was caught, but in that moment neither of them seemed to care all that much. All Catra needed was for Adora to hold her while she cried, and all Adora wanted was to be there for her girl. And that’s exactly what she did, she laid in Catra’s bed with her, holding her close but being careful not to apply too much pressure; she pressed soft kisses to her face and hair and shoulder; she whispered sweet nothings, assuring her that she was there, that she wasn’t going to leave her, that she meant the whole world and more to her. They let their tears fall to Catra’s pillow, breaths heavy, chests heaving, nothing on their minds except each other.

Adora didn’t end up leaving till sunrise and that was only because Catra begged her to, knowing full well that Shadow Weaver would be waking up soon to tend to her garden. Adora thought that was hysterical; the woman couldn’t properly care for a child but had no trouble waking up at dawn to water some plants. Nevertheless, she listened to her girl’s pleading and left, knowing for sure that Light Hope would catch her returning and probably scold her for the rest of eternity.

She had pushed a loose strand of hair out of Catra’s face, smiled that heartwarming smile, and with one last kiss, bid her adieu.

“Caught in the act.”

“Hope, before you yell at me, let me explain.”

“How do you plan to explain escaping in the middle of the night and not returning until morning?” The woman had a furious look on her face, with her arms crossed over her chest, “I even checked the clearing, you were not there.”

“I had to go check on Catra.” Adora sighed, knowing Catra probably wouldn’t appreciate her confession, “She was in trouble.”

“Whatever trouble your friend-“

“Girlfriend.”

“Yes, excuse me, whatever trouble your girlfriend has found herself in could have waited until later on, I am sure.”

Adora shook her head, “No, you don’t understand. She’s in a very bad place right now.”

Light Hope rose a brow, “Where is she?”

“I don’t mean literally; I just mean she’s going through something very difficult and she needed me.” Adora bit the inside of her cheek, “If Mara had needed you, wouldn’t you have snuck out to help her?”

“I risked everything for Mara.”

“And I would do that for Catra.”

Light Hope pondered for a moment before sighing, “Very well.”

Adora smiled and tackled the woman in a hug, muttering a quick, “Thanks for understanding.”, into her shoulder.

“Yes, well…” Hope tapped her back a couple times, “Now, go prepare for school. I will begin cooking breakfast.”

That day, Adora was a stumbling, stuttering mess. She had barely gotten any sleep because of everything that happened, and she was crippled with anxiety because Catra didn’t show up to school at all. She assumed it was because Catra was in too much pain to even get out of bed but she knew something much worse might have happened, and the feeling only grew stronger when Catra failed to respond to any of her messages.

She snuck out again that night to check on Catra, and again the next night, and again every night for the next two weeks; Catra had returned to school two days later, assuring her girlfriend that she was doing better, that her injuries were healing quickly, but Adora insisted on visiting her every night for those two weeks regardless. She was losing a lot of sleep and her focus was never on whatever she was supposed to be doing, even her coach was getting worried, but it was worth it knowing that Catra was okay. Well, not okay. She was most definitely not okay. But she was alive and Adora knew that for sure and for the time being, that was enough to subside her anxiety.

She was thankful that after that occurrence, Catra seemed to be in a slightly better situation, better meaning that it was never as bad as it was that day, but still that didn’t stop her from worrying. She began checking in on her every day, sometimes multiple times in the same hour, making sure she wasn’t hurt, that she was eating enough and staying hydrated, offering her bites of her own food to make sure she was getting enough nutrition. It was beginning to bother Catra.

“You doin’ okay?” Adora had asked, as they laid in her bed watching a movie on her laptop.

“Jesus Christ.” Catra had muttered before catching her girlfriend’s gaze, “Adora, I’m fine, will you quit asking?”

“I’m just worried about you.”

“Well, don’t be.” Her tone had grown harsh and Adora was a bit taken back for a moment before echoing that same bite in her own words.

“Sorry that I care about my girlfriend’s health.”

“I told you I’m fine, I don’t get why you can’t just let it go.”

Adora stared at the brunette in disbelief, “Let it go?” She got up from the bed, “You want me to just let it go? Catra, I thought I had lost you that day. I thought you were gone, I thought she had done something that…” She sighed, not letting the thought escape her mind, “I thought I’d never see you again. And I know, I get it, I realize that I’ve being sort of overbearing lately, and yeah, maybe I overexaggerated a little bit, but you promised me everything was going to be okay, you promised me you’d be alright, and then I didn’t hear back from you all day! I showed up to your house and I’d never seen you look so miserable, so broken. You were in so much pain, Catra, and I couldn’t do anything about it.”

Now Catra was on her feet as well, “It’s not your job to take care of me, Adora.”

“Yes, it is! It is! Because you’re my girlfriend, you’re my _best_ friend, and you mean everything to me, and I’d never forgive myself if something happened to you while I just sat around and did nothing to stop it.” Angry tears began to trickle down her flushed cheeks, the tingling sensation bringing her attention to how hot her face had gotten in that moment.

Catra felt a knot in her chest as she approached the blonde, silently wiping her tears away.

“I get it.” She nodded, holding eye contact, “But you can’t keep treating me like I’m some helpless little kid.”

“You are a kid.”

“We’re the same age.”

“Yeah, well, I’m a kid, too.” Adora shrugged, “That’s how I know that this, all of this, everything that your mo- that Shadow Weaver is doing to you, it’s too much for you to handle on your own.” She swallowed hard, reaching for Catra’s hand, which was still placed on her cheek, and holding it in both of hers, “Please, just let me be there for you.”

“Adora, no.” She shook her head, “If you get too close, she’ll rope you into it, too, and _I’d_ never forgive _myself_ if I let that happen to you.”

“Too close? You said it yourself, Catra, we’ve been dating since we were seven,” She let herself laugh despite the seriousness of the moment, “Can’t get any closer than that.” Catra didn’t budge and Adora sighed, dropping the fake smile she’d formed, “Catra, I’m not gonna let you deal with this alone anymore.”

“I…” She shook her head, clearing her mind, “You really wanna be involved?” Adora nodded, holding her gaze, and this time Catra sighed before sitting them both back down on the bed and telling Adora everything about her relationship with her foster mother, the movie still quietly playing on Adora’s laptop long forgotten.

To say that Adora’s blood boiled at hearing what that malevolent woman had done to her girl would be an understatement. If it weren’t for Catra’s pleading gaze, she might’ve made her way all the way over to her house and attempted to beat the life out of the woman; not that she’d be able to, Adora was just a kid and Catra had made it very clear that, although her foster mother looked to be scrawny and frail, she could definitely hold her own using her powers of sorcery. She had tried to reason with her, tried to convince her to tell an adult, to ask someone for help, but to no avail, Catra didn’t want anyone else to know.

Adora didn’t stop checking in on Catra, never stopped making sure she was doing okay, never stopped offering her food or water, never stopped asking if she wanted to spend the night (the answer to that one was always the same, not because Catra didn’t want to but because she knew her situation would become much worse if she ever accepted). Catra didn’t stop showing up to school with bruises but she also never stopped opening up to Adora about what happened; if Adora asked, Catra told her, and when she cried, Adora held her.

Some weeks were better than others but no matter what happened at home, Catra could always count on Adora being around to comfort her, and she promised Adora she’d always be around to return the favor when she needed her to. At times, when it would be too much and Catra couldn’t get the words out, Adora would brush a soothing hand through her hair, tell her that it was okay, that she wasn’t going to force her to speak up if the time wasn’t right, assured her that she’d be there if Catra ever was ready to talk about it.

Occasionally, Catra would call Adora late at night, speaking in frantic whispers about a nightmare she’d had or something Shadow Weaver had said, high off her own anxieties and Adora would talk her down, assure her that even if she couldn’t be there in person, she wouldn’t get off the line until she was sure Catra was feeling better and she always kept true to that promise, even when she’d show up to school the next morning with tired, bloodshot eyes. Eventually it got to the point where Catra was worried she’d been causing Adora more harm than good and she decided to start keeping her onslaught of midnight panic attacks to herself, not wanting to keep bringing Adora into it after they had become detrimental to her health.

Adora noticed the change but decided against bringing it up, instead opting to simply check in on the situation whenever she could.

“Are you still having those late-night panic attacks?” She’d ask.

“Sometimes.” Catra would always say, never giving any more information.

“And you’ve got them under control?”

“Yeah.” Not entirely true, but Adora didn’t need to know that.

Those conversations continued until one night, Catra was the one who got the call.

“Hello?” Her voice was groggy and tired and half-muffled because her face was smooshed into her pillow.

There was a sigh of relief. “Catra? You’re okay?”

At the sound of Adora’s voice, Catra sat up and pushed her hair out of her face, “Adora? Yeah, I’m fine...” She could hear the way Adora’s breathing was raggedy, as if she was trembling, “What’s wrong, princess?”

“Nothing.” She answered too quickly. “I just, uh… I had a nightmare and I just wanted to check in on you.”

“I’m okay, don’t worry.” She paused, listening to Adora’s breathing for a moment. It wasn’t as shaky as before, but she still sounded a bit off. “Do you wanna stay on the line till you fall asleep?”

Another sigh of relief. “Yes, please.” A pause. “Thank you.”

Catra smiled, gentle, lazy. “Anytime, princess.”

That night, Catra stayed on the line with Adora until she fell back asleep and the next morning at school, she was tackled in an epic bear hug with, what felt like, hundreds of kisses to the face.

“What was that for?” Catra had laughed, grinning like a lovestruck idiot.

“For being the best girlfriend in the world.” Adora had declared, and Catra couldn’t help the flush of her cheeks as Adora pressed one more kiss to the tip of her nose.

They had a good relationship. At times, they did become a tad too dependent on one another, but it wasn’t something that went unnoticed by either of them. Catra tended to create a sort of distance between them whenever it came to her attention, while Adora was a little more lenient, simply concluding that it was normal for them to count on one another so often and so heavily because they’d known each other for so long. Neither response resulted in the best outcome, but they didn’t know what else to do, they were still kids, after all. Regardless, they supported one another in everything, with Catra showing up to all of Adora’s soccer games, cheering her on from the bleachers and silently swooning over how good she looked in her uniform, and with Adora making a point of hyping up Catra every time she presented her with a new art piece she’d been working on.

So, yes, they had a few obstacles to overcome, but there was no doubt in their minds that they’d be able to get past whatever life threw at them because that’s just how they worked.  
Besides, Catra was Adora’s star, she’d said so herself just a few years ago, and if there’s anything she knew for sure, it’s that, no matter what, Catra was always gonna be _her_ star.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They were still going strong a year later and on their one year anniversary, something Adora made it very clear she was keen on celebrating, meanwhile Catra showed an air of nonchalance whenever the topic was brought up regardless of the fact that she was just as excited, if not more, as Adora, on the inside.

“Guess who.” Adora whispered, coming up behind Catra at her locker, slipping her hands over her eyes.

“A murderer?”

“Close.”

“Wait, what? Close?” Catra laughed, turning around in Adora’s arms to kiss her. “Happy anniversary.”

“Happy anniversary.” Adora smiled and kissed her again. “You look beautiful today.”

Catra jokingly whipped her hair and batted her eyelashes, “I always do.” She shut her locker and took Adora’s hand as they walked the halls.

“Ah, how modest.” Adora chuckled, gently nudging Catra’s shoulder with hers, “But seriously, you do.” Catra blushed at the sincerity in her girlfriend’s tone but said nothing, showing her appreciation only with the soft smile playing on her lips.

“Can you believe we made it a whole year?”

“Technically, we made it eight whole years.” She rolled her eyes at the deadpanned look Adora gave her, “But yes, I can believe it. We’re, like, meant for each other.”

Adora grinned down at the brunette, unable to contain her happiness, “Look who’s being sappy.”

“It’s your fault.” Catra huffed, “Your sappiness is rubbing off on me.”

“I don’t see how that’s a bad thing.”

“Hey lovebirds!” A deep voice called from beside them as two new figures joined them on their walk, “Happy anniversary.”

“I can’t believe you two made it a whole year.” Glimmer muttered from beside him.

“What’s the matter, Sparkles?” Catra rose a challenging brow at her, “You jealous?”

“Ew. You wish.” Glimmer scrunched up her face, jokingly shoving Catra’s shoulder as the four of them walked.

“So, what’s the agenda for today?” Bow wondered, glancing around the group.

“We’re going down to the diner and you two aren’t invited.” Catra replied, though there was no bite to her bark. She’d quickly become close friends with Bow and Glimmer, just as Adora had suspected, and this back-and-forth had become a key part of their friendship.

“We wouldn’t even want to join you guys,” Glimmer scoffed, “Who wants to sit at the opposite end of the booth while you two morons make out for hours?”

Catra smirked, “Hey, that’s still more action than you’ve gotten in months.” Glimmer almost immediately turned into a flustered, sputtering mess and Adora playfully punched Catra’s shoulder as she laughed right in the pink-haired girl’s face.

“Catra.” Adora scolded, doing her best to give Catra a disciplining look.

“Yeah, Catra, listen to your wife and stop harassing me.” Glimmer mocked, only to suddenly break out into a run as Catra angrily chased her down the halls. Glimmer made a point of teleporting away every time Catra got close enough, but only so that she was just a few steps ahead, because the truth was, she enjoyed these moments with Catra; the moments when they pretended they wanted to kill each other, that’s just how their friendship worked. They were constantly making an effort to piss each other off.

“So,” Bow smiled, glancing down at Adora as they continued to walk in a steady pace, unlike their friends, “A whole year, huh?”

“Yeah…” She smiled right back, feeling her heart melt at the thought, “She makes me really happy.”

“I can tell,” He put an arm over her shoulder, subtly pulling her into a side hug, “And it’s clear you make her really happy, too” They walked in comfortable silence after that, slowly following after the other two girls who had already made it to the group’s first class of the day.

Adora isn’t sure when it all went so wrong.

The fight came a year, three months, and eighteen days into their relationship.

One moment, they were lying on Adora’s bed, listening to some alternative playlist Catra had put together; Catra was on her back, head resting against Adora’s pillow, eyes drifted shut like she’d never been so at peace. Adora was lying on her side, somewhat propped up on her elbow so she could see Catra’s face and press soft kisses to it every few minutes or so. The hem of Catra’s shirt had ridden up slightly and Adora was gently tracing patterns on the fur of her stomach with her fingertips, occasionally causing Catra to giggle and mutter something about how it tickled. It was such a nice moment for them.

It _seemed_ like such a nice moment for them.

But the next thing Adora knew, the moment had faded away and a screaming match ensued in the middle of her bedroom, a place that used to be so good, so safe for them.

She couldn’t remember the details, or rather, she didn’t want to. Something about Catra accusing her of cheating on her. Adora scoffed at the thought. Catra was certain, absolutely positive, that Adora was cheating on her with one of the girls on her soccer team, Lonnie. Catra never liked her, always claimed she had a bad feeling about the girl, even when Adora tried her best to convince her that she was a nice, sweet girl who never even did anything for Catra to have so much distaste towards her; apparently, Adora’s defense of the girl only managed to further convince Catra that she was cheating.

She begged, pleaded, did everything in her power to convince Catra that it wasn’t true, that she would never do something so dishonest, never break her trust in that way, she did everything she could to convince Catra that she cared about her more than anything in the world. But Catra walked away. She walked out of her room, out of her house, and out of her life, without so much as a second glance.

“Catra, please. Please, don’t leave.”

“Adora, don’t make this harder than it needs to be.”

“I need you.”

She shook her head, eyes shut tight, “You don’t.”

“Please.” She had swallowed hard, choking back tears, “Please, Catra.”

Catra sighed, growing tired of the conversation.

“Stay.”

She didn’t.

Adora broke down that night. She refused to talk to Light Hope, refused to respond to any of Bow or Glimmer’s texts, she refused to eat or sleep. As soon as Catra left, the only thing she managed to do was fall to her knees and cry, and she didn’t get up from that spot until the next morning, when she woke up with her tear stained cheeks pressed against her bedroom floor.

Adora didn’t understand. She couldn’t understand. She wanted, with everything in her, to understand why Catra had ended things, she needed to know, needed to have some kind of excuse, some kind of reason to pin this awful feeling inside of her on. But she couldn’t.

It just didn’t make any sense. This came out of nowhere. They were good, they were so fucking good, so why did it end? Why did Catra end it? Why did it have to end?

That’s what she had said, wasn’t it?

“Adora, no. It’s over. This? What we have? It has to end.”

The words echoed in Adora’s mind, loud and clear.

It had to end.

But why?

Adora couldn’t understand.

Or, maybe, deep down inside, she simply didn’t want to.

She skipped school that day, not that she let Hope know that. She had made her way out the front door, waving a hurried goodbye to the older woman who was already distracted trying to find her car keys, but then went round to the side of the house and climbed back up in through her window, an act she’d perfected after sneaking out to see the stars all those years ago. Hope would be leaving for work soon so Adora was sure she’d have the house to herself for at least a few hours, not that it mattered considering all she wanted to do was lay in bed and cry and scream and wonder what she’d done wrong.

Well, she already knew the answer, or rather she already knew what Catra thought the answer was, she simply couldn’t figure out why Catra thought that. Adora would never cheat on her, she would never even consider the idea, let alone actually go through with it.

Before she could stop herself, she was already grabbing her phone and typing out a text to Catra.

**can we talk?**

  
The words “Read 7:32 AM” flashed back at her and she waited for a response, but it never came.

Well, if being dumped by the love of her life didn’t break her heart, being left on read sure sealed the deal.

She sighed and typed again.

**please?**

And again, no reply.

That really did it, the next thing she knew, she had thrown her phone at the wall and shoved her face into her pillow, letting out all her frustration in muffled screams.

Why was Catra doing this? Did she not care about her at all?

Adora forced herself to attend school the next day, partly because she had assignments due and soccer practice after class, but mostly because she had to see Catra again. Evidently, that seemed to be the last thing Catra wanted because every time Adora came even close to approaching her, she’d turn and walk away and Adora would completely lose sight of her in a matter of seconds.

“Heyyyy buddy…” Bow had a sympathetic smile on his face as he and Glimmer approached her when she was by her locker, she hated it. “You doing okay?”

“You heard?” It wasn’t really a question because she already knew the answer, nevertheless, Glimmer nodded.

“We went up to her yesterday to ask where you were because you weren’t answering our texts, she told us to buzz off.” Adora couldn’t help but snort at Catra’s supposed lack of inappropriate language. It reminded her of that first time she’d come over to her house, how she’d asked her not to swear, how Catra had dropped the habit entirely right then and there in that moment, because Adora had asked her to… She was shaken from her stupor when Glimmer set a hand on her shoulder, “So, what happened exactly? What was the fight about?”

“Yeah, I’m sure if you tell us we can help you guys figure this thing out.” Bow’s smile turned hopeful and he nodded, urging Adora to explain. Somehow, her face fell even more.

“What?” She swallowed down the lump in her throat, preparing herself to finally say those dreaded words out loud, “Guys, we broke up.”

Glimmer’s hand dropped from her shoulder, meanwhile Bow’s hand raised to cup his mouth which had fallen ajar.

“Wh-what?” Glimmer’s brows furrowed, “We thought she was just in a bad mood cause you guys had a fight or something…”

“Well,” Adora sighed, shoving a book into her locker, “There _was_ a fight, a big one, and it ended in her…” She bit her lip, shutting her eyes for a moment and willing those stupid tears now to fall, “Dumping me.”

“Oh, my gosh.” Bow stepped forward, pulling his arms around her shoulders in a weirdly positioned hug, “I’m so sorry, Adora.”

“I don’t understand-“

“Ha, join the club.” Adora muttered, Glimmer ignored it.

“Why’d she break up with you?” She rose a questioning brow, “Last I heard, you two were obsessed with each other.”

Adora shrugged, not bothering to hold eye contact, “She thinks I cheated even though I didn’t.”

“You would never do that.” Bow interjected.

“I know that.”

“So, why does she think you did?” Glimmer questioned, running a hand through her floppy hair.

“I don’t know.” Adora sighed, “She thinks I had something with Lonnie.”

Bow’s jaw dropped again, “Lonnie from our team Lonnie?”

“Yup, that Lonnie.”

“Isn’t she dating that other guy on your team?” Glimmer pondered, “The big lizard dude?”

“I don’t know.” Adora mumbled.

“Rogelio? No, I’m pretty sure he’s dating that guy Kyle, from the cheerleading team.” Bow corrected, “Though maybe they’re some kinda throuple? I’m really not sure, but I am sure that she’s never done anything with Adora.”

“Okay, thanks for the talk, guys, but I’m gonna head to class.” Adora shut her locker and began walking off, even as Bow and Glimmer called after her, saying something about how they didn’t have class for another fifteen minutes.

She made her way to the library, found a small table that was wrapped in a tightly hidden corner of the room, and sat there for the next fifteen minutes with her head resting on her backpack. Adora was gonna be honest, in that moment, she wanted nothing more than to not be alive. It may sound overdramatic, but it was the truth; Adora had spent most of her life with Catra by her side, they spoke almost every day since they were seven, they made hundreds of memories together, and now, what? She was expected to forget about all of that? To just let Catra go like she meant nothing to her? She couldn’t do that, nor did she want to. Catra meant way too much to her for her to just give up on her, on them, on what they had. She sighed, albeit a bit too loudly considering where she was, into the fabric of her backpack… the backpack that Catra had helped her pick out, the backpack that Catra had spent every one of their algebra lessons doodling little designs on, the backpack that had “Adora hearts Catra” and “Catra hearts Adora” scribbled all over it.

She decided that she didn’t care if she ended up being late to practice that day, coach Huntara be damned, she had to speak to a certain someone.

“Hey.”

A sigh. “What?”

“I need you to explain what happened.”

“Listen, I already told you-“

“Catra.” Her jaw was clenched, eyes pleading, “Please. I need to understand what happened.”

Catra sighed again, still not making eye contact. She had ended up cornering the catgirl at her locker after school, knowing full well that she couldn’t leave without her art portfolio, which she always waited till the last minute to grab. “You’re gonna have to figure this one out on your own, princess.” And with that, she shut her locker and sauntered away, leaving Adora even more broken than she had been that morning.

She didn’t like the way that nickname, which once had been a term of endearment, slipped out of Catra’s mouth laced with venom. It hurt like hell.

After practice, which began with a round of suicide drills thanks to Adora’s brief tardiness, she made her way to the clearing in the woods, haphazardly throwing herself onto the grass. Bow had offered to help her get home, assuming she wasn’t in the right state of mind to make her way on her own, but she brushed him off, hurrying off school grounds as fast she possibly could because, truth be told, all she really wanted was to be alone. Or to be with Catra, but that clearly wasn’t an option for her anymore.

She sighed, locking her gaze on the few stars that were already beginning to show themselves to her. “Can you explain to me what’s happening?” She wondered out loud, “Because I just lost the love of my life and I have no idea why and to be honest with you, it’s kinda driving me insane.”

As much as she wanted to believe the stars could talk back to her, they couldn’t. She was on her own. Nevertheless, she let out another sigh and continued talking, telling them every thought that popped into her head, all of which, were about Catra.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Adora was sixteen, she still had absolutely no idea what had gone wrong, she had no idea why Catra thought she would ever be unfaithful to her when all she’d ever wanted was to make her happy and prove to her that she meant more to her than anything else in the world.

She was so distraught that she pretty much threw herself into soccer training, working to become better, stronger, faster, and it helped… Kind of, sort of, not really. Well, she had definitely gotten fitter, in fact she could actually beat Bow in arm wrestling matches now, something he seemed to be very upset over, and she was doing a lot better during practice, always earning some kind of compliment from their coach. But her mind still wandered to Catra whenever it had the chance; “I wonder what Catra’s doing right now” … “Do you think Catra did well on that algebra test last week?” … “Bananas were Catra’s least favorite fruit” … “Oh, you’re colorblind? So’s Catra” … “Cool crop top, Bow, y’know, Catra always looked so pretty in crop tops” … etc.

She still talked about her to anyone that would listen. To Light Hope, to coach Huntara, to Bow and Glimmer, to her teammates, her classmates, to the stars. She talked about her a lot. She talked about her so much, in fact, that Glimmer was beginning to grow a little irritated.

“Adora, enough.” She sighed, smacking a hand to her face, “You’ve been talking about her nonstop for the past hour, can we please move on to something else now?”

“Do you think she’s moved on?” Adora asked, eyes suddenly bugging out, “Oh, my gosh. Do you think she’s dating that Scorpia chick she keeps hanging around?”

“Adora, I swear to-“

“Okaaaaay.” Bow interjected, setting a hand on Glimmer’s back to calm her down, “Glimmer, our friend is dealing with a breakup, it’s only fair that we allow her to get some things out of her system.”

“Bow, they broke up, what? Like, eight months ago?!”

He shot the pink-haired girl a pointed look, “Some wounds take longer to heal, we shouldn’t pressure her.”

“But- Wait…” Glimmer looked around their table, then around the cafeteria, then her gaze turned back to Bow, “Where’d she go?”

“You don’t think she…”

“Ugh. Of course, she did!” Glimmer then teleported away, and back a moment later but with the shirt of Adora’s collar in one hand and Adora’s phone in the other.

“Adora!” Bow scolded, “You’re not supposed to text her, it’s not part of the moving on process.”

“She was my everything, Bow.” Adora sounded so unlike herself, so hurt, so miserable, so broken. “How are we supposed to suddenly start living without each other?”

“She’s been avoiding you for months, Adora, clearly she’s doing just fine.” Glimmer tried to reason with her but that was definitely not the right thing to say. Bow made it very clear with the look he was shooting her way, and it looked like even Glimmer realized her mistake. Adora simply tried to blink back the tears, not wanting to cause a scene in the middle of their lunch period.

What none of them had realized at the time was that Catra was just as hurt as Adora was, just maybe not for the reasons they’d assume.

Adora had spent every night, since they broke up, out in the clearing, watching the stars, talking to them about how much she missed her girl. Except she wasn’t her girl anymore. That’s why Adora was here, wasn’t it? If Catra was still _her girl_ they’d be together right now. In her bed, kissing and cuddling and laughing over some stupid inside joke. At the diner, splitting that same short stack of pancakes they always used to order, even though Adora could definitely afford to get them each their own at this point. At the park, sitting on the swings and telling each other about their dreams from the previous night. Out here, lying on the grass at the clearing, or maybe leaning back against a tree, or sitting atop their favorite branch, the one that was wide enough for them to sit side by side, but not so wide that there was room for any space between them. They’d be looking up at the sky, watching the stars, well Adora would be watching the stars, Catra would be watching Adora. They’d be sneaking kisses, holding hands, talking, laughing, smiling, enjoying each other’s presence. It didn’t matter if it was quiet enough for her to hear Catra purring, or so loud that she couldn’t even hear her speak, she was always happy so long as Catra was there, by her side, making her feel safe.

And now? Now Adora felt exposed. As if, at any moment, something bad could sneak up behind her and she’d be completely defenseless.

The thought made her blood run cold, caused her heart to ache, had a thick lump forming in her throat that no amount of clearing could get rid of. But then again, that dreadful feeling had started the moment Catra had stepped foot out of her bedroom on that awful day all those months ago, and it hadn’t stopped, not even for a moment.

When Catra’s 16th birthday came around, Adora already had her present ready and wrapped.

“I can’t believe you bought her a camera after what she did to you.” Glimmer grumbled, rolling her eyes at the box in Adora’s hands.

“I bought it for her before everything that happened, I was just waiting for her birthday to give it to her.” She sighed, “Besides, I’ve been saving up for over two years to get her this, I’m not just gonna not give it to her.”

“Might I remind you; she seems like she hates your guts.”

Adora’s face fell, “Yeah, thanks Glimmer, totally needed that reminder.”

“Sooorry! I’m just saying,” She raised her hands in defense, “If someone cheated on me, I don’t think I’d want anything from them, not even a super cool birthday gift.”

“I didn’t cheat on her.”

“Well, she thinks you did.”

“But I didn’t.”

“Okay, okay. I know that.” She hugged, “Geez, if there’s anyone that needs convincing, it’s Cat-“ She quickly cut herself off at the look Adora shot her. “Right. Not supposed to say her name. Sorry.”

Adore sighed again, looking around the halls to make sure no one was around, “Look, just keep an eye out, okay? If someone shows up, teleport me outta there.” Glimmer nodded at the instructions and then Adora stepped out into the hallway of lockers, making her way over to Catra’s.

She put in Catra’s combination, which she still remembered for some totally-normal-not-at-all-creepy reason, and hurriedly but gently put the giftbox on top of some textbooks before shutting the locker door and going back over to where Glimmer was waiting.

“…Ya know, that really wasn’t as high stakes as you made it seem-“

“I realize that now!”

The next time Adora opened her locker, a sticky note swooped out. All it read was ‘thx’ but Adora decided that that was better than nothing, as even just those three little letters caused something in her heart to flutter. What was even nicer was what happened a few weeks later, when she noticed that Catra had joined the photography club and was actually using the digital camera she’d gifted her to take all sorts of photos, which she’d make a point of posting on social media. She chose a digital camera because the lady working at the store explained that it would instantly store all the photos Catra would take on a memory card, thus allowing her to look through a gallery of her own work whenever she wanted; she had laughed a little when the woman told her that because she knew how much Catra would appreciate the instant gratification.

She thought it was a little funny how Catra making an effort to actually use her gift was a sort of instant gratification for her as well. The camera seemed to make them both happy and so Adora had zero regrets about purchasing it.

Adora really started appreciating the camera when the photography club had started making a point of attending every soccer game to take photos, meaning Catra was at every soccer game taking photos, meaning Adora got to see Catra at every soccer game while she took photos. It was nice, if a little distracting, to have Catra around at her games again, and although she wasn’t cheering her on the way she used to, seeing Catra standing by the sidelines, snapping photos with the camera she’d given her… it made Adora really happy, and when Adora was happy, she played better.

Adora scored the winning goal at their biggest game of the season. Catra captured the moment perfectly. The school paper published an article about Adora’s kick and right there, on the front page beside Adora’s name, was Catra’s photo with her credit underneath.

It felt nice for them to be together again, even if was just both their names printed on a piece of paper.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Catra was still avoiding her. It had been nearly two years and Catra was still avoiding her. Her 17th birthday came and went and Catra didn’t say a word to her. Well, Catra’s friend Scorpia had run up to her, seemingly out of breath, and wished her a happy birthday and Adora decided to assume that the message came from Catra because Scorpia had never spoken to her before and had no possible way of even knowing it was her birthday in the first place. Regardless, Adora knew Catra was simply returning the favor after the whole camera situation.

Adora didn’t mind because she still didn’t seem to hold much of a grudge against Catra, despite the lack of care the girl had taken with her fragile heart. She simply… missed her.

She was in some random convenience store when she spotted her, once. She found some mop bucket, set it down to try to reach the fudge bars in the very back of the freezer aisle. Tripped and landed straight into a certain embrace that she knew all too well.

“Oh.” Her eyes met mismatched ones. “Um, thanks.” She’d mumbled, offering a gentle smile.

She was repaid with an irritated eyeroll. “Whatever.” She helped Adora back to her feet, barely even getting the words, “This is not because I like you.” Out before she was already gone, walking straight out of the store like she hadn’t even planned to buy anything.

Adora got the fudge bars. They all got freezer burned. It was not a good day.

Months later, and she constantly caught herself staring whenever they passed each other in the halls, and when she didn’t catch herself, either Bow or Glimmer made a point of telling her. Sometimes, when they had a class together, Adora would attempt to sit near Catra but she would promptly move, forcing some scrawny blond kid to switch seats with her. Adora still went to the clearing often, sometimes she’d picture Catra there with her, which she knew was kind of weird and maybe even a little creepy, but she missed her. She missed her with all her heart. And all she wanted was for Catra to magically show up at the clearing and kiss her. If she had one wish, that would be it.

“Okay… I also wish for a million dollars.”

“What?”

“Nothing.” She gulped, “Catra, what are you doing he-“ But before she could finish asking the question, Catra had her pushed against a tree trunk, that same tree trunk she had pushed Catra against years ago, and kissed her.

When they pulled away, “Seriously, what are you doing here?”

“I’m kissing you, what does it look like I’m doing?” She kissed her again.

“But why?” Adora mumbled against her lips, feeling slightly out breath with her cheeks flushed and her hair poof even poofier than usual.

Catra shrugged, “Because I missed it.” She quickly cut eye contact to glance back down at Adora’s lips, “I really, really missed it.” _I missed you._

Adora swallowed hard but refrained from moving, waiting to see what Catra’s next move would be. Apparently, her next move was to kiss her again, this time deeper and heavier and breathier, and as Catra lowered her hands from Adora’s shoulders down to her hips, Adora pushed her hands into Catra’s hair, gently tugging on it in an attempt to pull her closer into her.

Catra’s hands traveled up and under Adora’s shirt, causing her to suck in a deep breath when the catgirl ran her nails over her abs.

“Hm,” Catra smirked into their kiss, “Those are new.”

And that’s when Adora realized that she hadn’t kissed Catra in almost two years, hadn’t kissed Catra since before she started working out like crazy, hadn’t kissed Catra since back when Catra was just a little bit stronger than her, and when that realization dawned on her, she swooped her hands down to Catra’s sides and used her strength to flip them around so that Catra was the one pressed up against the tree.

“Mhm.” She just barely pulled away to speak, “I don’t know if you’ve noticed but I’ve kinda become a soccer superstar.”

Catra snorted, “Yeah, idiot, I take all the pictures for the school paper.”

Adora smirked, eyeing Catra with a certain look, “Mm, congrats on the camera, by the way.”

“Thanks, an idiot I know gave it to me.”

“Calling me an idiot twice in under a minute? What is that, some kind of record?” Catra looked like she was about to reply with some snarky comment, but before she could, Adora kissed her again; hard and rough and with just a little bit of anger that she didn’t even realize she was holding in.

The make out session carried on for a long while that night, and someone’s shirt may or may not have come off at one point, and someone else’s neck may or may not have been covered in one or two or five hickeys by the end of it and yet, the next day at school, nothing but silence was uttered between the two. Needless to say, it confused Adora more than anything. She didn’t like not understanding Catra’s actions, though considering she hadn’t really _known_ Catra for quite some time now, she figured there was really nothing she could do about it… except for ask her.

**so…**

She had texted.

**?**

She received back.

Adora: **you kissed me**

Catra: **yes and?**

Adora: **idk**

Catra: **ok**

And that was it. Adora didn’t send another text and neither did Catra. Adora didn’t attempt to speak to Catra again, and Catra didn’t attempt to speak to Adora. So, that was it.

Except that, now that they’d kissed again for the first time in a long time, Adora couldn’t stop thinking about her. Well, she couldn’t stop thinking about her even before that, but now that they’d kiss it had become even worse.

“You, what?!” Glimmer’s head looked like it was going to explode.

“You… You and Catra…” Bow could barely get the words out, fortunately Glimmer got them out for him.

“You and Catra kissed?!”

Okay, so maybe telling them in the middle of the library was a horrible idea.

In her defense, it had been three days since it happened and keeping it in had been killing her, but she’d promised them a long time ago that she’d stop talking about Catra all the time and for a while, she actually kept that promise. Of course, now that they’d made out in the middle of the woods, she wasn’t sure if the rule still applied and after countless mental arguments with herself about the whole ordeal, she finally decided to just come right out and say it, albeit at the worst possible time. They had been sitting at one of the tables at the library, studying for their algebra midterm when she randomly blurted it out in a not-so-hushed whisper.

And then Glimmer repeated it at the top of her lungs.

Pretty much every single person in the library shushed her, some even twice. Glimmer simply shot back a glare before turning back to the blonde.

“You and Catra kissed? Adora, what the fuck?” She said again, a lot quieter this time.

Bow glared at her, “Glimmer, language.”

“Sorry.” She did not seem sorry. “Adora, seriously, what were you thinking?”

“I-“

“I’ll tell you what you were thinking, you weren’t thinking! How could you kiss her after what she did to you? She broke your heart when she left you and now, what? You’re just gonna go off and kiss her? Like it never happened? I mean, c’mon, Adora, be-“

“Glimmer, maybe you should let Adora actually explain herself before you start going off on her like that.” Bow suggested, shooting Adora a supportive smile.

“What could there possibly be to explain?” Glimmer muttered, crossing her arms over her chest in that stubborn way she tended to do, giving Adora a pointed look that told her to go ahead and try to explain herself.

“Well, I was in the woods talking to the stars-“

“What are those?”

“Not important to the story. As I was saying, I was in the woods, just, y’know, chilling out, living my life, when out of nowhere, Catra showed up.” Adora explained, trying her best to keep her voice at a low whisper, “And I was really surprised, honestly I thought I might’ve been dreaming because I’d been having this recurring dream that Catra would randomly show up in the woods and-“

“Ew,” Glimmer cut in, “Please, we don’t need the details of your weird wet dreams about Catra.”

“They’re not wet dreams!” She glared at the shorter girl before continuing, “ _As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted,_ Catra showed up and before I could even really process what was happening, she kissed me.”

“Oh, okay. So, she kissed you, you didn’t kiss her.” Bow nodded, smiling at the blonde in understanding.

“…Well…”

His smile dropped and he sighed, “Good god, Adora, what’d you do?”

“Okay, so she kissed me, and then I may have kissed her back, and then I may have pinned her against a tree… and kissed her neck… and she may have… pulled my shirt off-“

“In the middle of the woods?” Glimmer’s eyebrows flew up and under her floppy hair, “What are you two, animals?”

“Well, Catra is a-“

“Not the point here, Bow.” Glimmer interjected.

“Listen, we just made out, that’s all.” Adora defended, though it didn’t seem like much of a defense. “Besides, she hasn’t even spoken to me since so clearly it was a one time thing.”

Glimmer gave Adora a questioning look, “Are you implying that you hoped it wouldn’t be a one time thing?”

“I’m not implying anything, I was just hoping that it meant she wanted to get back together.”

“Back together?!” This time it was Bow who got shushed by everyone in the library, though unlike Glimmer, he made an effort to apologize before turning back to Adora, “Adora, you can’t be serious right now…”

“Why not?” She shrugged, “I wanna get back together with Catra, what’s wrong with that?”

“Ummm…” Glimmer began, pretending to ponder the question for a moment, “Are you forgetting the part where she smashed your heart into a million pieces? And then stomped on it? And then set it on fire? And then-“

“Okay, Glimmer,” Adora huffed, “I get it, I-“ She looked up and suddenly her jaw dropped a little at the sight in front of her.

Catra was there, in the library, standing by the front counter, talking to the librarian about something, Adora wasn’t close enough to hear what.

“What are you looking aaaa- Oh.” Bow mumbled, matching Adora’s gaze, followed by Glimmer. The two quickly turned back to Adora and tried their best to nudge her out of her stupor but to no avail. “Adora. Psst, Adora.”

It was no use. Her eyes were locked on Catra, watching her like a hawk, it was quite unsettling, but luckily the brunette hadn’t seemed to noti- No, nope, never-mind. She looked up and met Adora’s gaze, though she didn’t seem to be quite as awestruck as the blonde was. She simply rolled her eyes and called out a, “Stop staring at me, idiot.” Before turning back to her conversation with the librarian.

Well, that was a start. At least she’d actually spoken _to_ Adora again.

Glimmer scoffed, rolling her eyes at the exchange. “Surprised she even knew this school had a library.” That comment upset Adora for multiple reasons.

It upset her because she didn’t like the insinuation that Catra wasn’t all that bright when Adora knew for a fact that she was one of the most intelligent people she’d ever met.

She also didn’t like that Glimmer presumed that Catra didn’t give a shit about her education enough to not even know what services the school provided.

But more than anything, she didn’t like how easily the comment brought back so many memories of so many moments Adora had made, right here in this very library, with Catra. This was their spot. Well, one of their spots. And yet, now… it was nothing more than a distant memory.

Adora understood that Glimmer’s comment really wasn’t all that deep, it was unimportant, some random jab at the girl who broke her friend’s heart, but truth be told, all it did was smash the pieces of Adora’s broken heart into even smaller pieces. Because that comment, that stupid little miniscule comment that Glimmer probably didn’t think twice about, didn’t realize the weight of, didn’t genuinely mean anything by… it rang over and over in Adora’s ears.

Much to her surprise, Catra showed up to the clearing again. Well actually it wasn’t really that surprising because Adora ended up texting her, asking her to meet her there. But it was pretty surprising that Catra actually listened.

“Hey Adora.”

Adora didn’t reply, she simply nodded her head towards the patch of grass beside her, silently asking Catra to take a seat beside her. She did just that, and they sat in silence for about an hour, both watching the sky, before heading back home and going their separate ways.

Adora continued going to the clearing every night and Catra continued meeting her there every night. Every night they sat in silence and just observed their surroundings, but… together. It felt nice to be together again, at least to Adora it did, and she could only assume that Catra felt the same because she continued coming out there every night. It wasn’t until about a week after they started meeting up that Adora finally said something.

“Can I ask you something?” She didn’t look at Catra, she just kept her gaze on the stars.

Adora was lying on the grass the same way she had been that very first night they’d met. Body relaxed, hands resting underneath her head, looking like she had not a single care in the world.

“Let me guess,” Catra was sitting up, keeping herself propped up on her hands with her legs extended out in front of her, but she wouldn’t look at Adora either. “You’re gonna ask me what happened?”

“Since you already know, why don’t you go ahead and answer the question.” Adora spoke with a certain tone. Soft yet expectant, relaxed yet… upset? She wasn’t quite sure how it was possible, but she was doing it.

Catra sighed, loud and clear. “I know you didn’t cheat on me, Adora.”

“Yeah, I know.”

She rose a challenging brow at her, just barely glancing over, “You know?”

“I know you better than anyone, Catra, of course I know.” Adora blew a breath out through her nose, still not looking over at Catra, “Tell me what really happened.”

Catra took a long pause. Adora waited.

“I was scared.”

“Of?”

“Hurting you.”

Adora sat up and turned to face Catra in one swift movement, “How come?”

Catra swallowed down her fear and tried her best to explain, “Things weren’t good between us, Adora, it had to end.”

Adora’s jaw clenched and she slammed her first down onto the grass, “No. Fuck that.” Catra was taken back at her language but said nothing. “Stop saying that. Just stop.” She shut her eyes and let out a shaky breath, “Stop with the excuses, Catra. Just tell me why you ended things.”

“Because we were hurting each other, Adora.” Catra sighed and ran a hand through her hair, “You were barely getting any sleep, you were always worrying more about me than about yourself, and I was taking everything out on you. I was pushing all my problems on to you and it was killing you and I didn’t wanna do that to you anymore.”

“And you felt that the best way to stop yourself from hurting me was to break my heart?” She scoffed, though it came off as a bitter laugh. “That’s some bull right there, Catra.”

“Well what exactly did you expect me to do, Adora? I tried pushing you away, tried to protect you and it didn’t work.”

“You should’ve talked to me about it! You should’ve been open and honest and told me what was wrong, we could’ve worked at it together. What did you even think you were protecting me from?”

“From myself.” Catra huffed, “I was suffocating you, Adora, why can’t you understand that?”

“No, you weren’t!”

“Yes, I was.”

“Catra-“

“No, you asked me to explain so shut up and listen.” Adora did as she was told. “I was in a very bad place for a very long time, we both knew that. But you tried to take it upon yourself to protect me when you were just a kid, Adora, we both were just kids and we found ourselves in a situation that we couldn’t handle on our own. And I know… I know that I was the one who asked you not to tell anyone else, that I was the one who told you it was going to be okay, but I was scared, and I didn’t know what else to do so I tried to convince you, I tried to convince myself, that we had the situation under control. And you… you tried to be strong, tried to take over, tried to be there for me and you were, you were always there for me and I appreciate that, I’ll never stop appreciating it. But… We became way too dependent on each other, Adora, and that wasn’t good for either of us.”

She tried to swallow down her tears, “I started depending on you to fix all my problems and you convinced yourself that you were capable of doing that. You were losing sleep over me, Adora, you were failing classes, your coach threatened to kick you off the team and I know you tried to hide that from me but I figured it out. How could I let myself continue to hurt you when you are the single most important person in my life?” The tears fell anyway. “So, I tried to convince myself that you had cheated on me. I told myself that it only made sense, that you’d found someone better who could offer you more, who didn’t have as messy of a family life, who didn’t lose their temper for no good reason, who could pay for their own meals, and who didn’t need someone to constantly be checking in on them. I convinced myself that you had found someone better and were going to leave me soon, anyway, so that I could end things and it wouldn’t hurt as much. But that plan failed in every way imaginable because it hurt like hell, Adora.”

Without another thought, Adora pulled her into her arms, brushing down her hair as she cried into her shoulder. “I’m sorry, Adora. I’m so sorry I hurt you. That was the last thing I ever wanted to do but…” She hiccupped, “But I didn’t know how else to keep you safe.”

Adora sighed, knowing full well that this was just the start of a very long, very painful conversation, but one that they had to have. But not right now, because maybe, right now, she could just be there for her girl. That conversation could wait another day.

Their nightly rendezvous carried on, with them opening up to one another on some nights and simply holding each other on others. Adora explained how the way Light Hope had raised her to believe that she was never allowed to make mistakes, never allowed an error in judgement, never allowed to admit failure had affected her in a way that left always striving to be the best, and thus made her feel that it was her job to protect everyone, no matter what, regardless of how much harm it caused her. Catra explained that her troubled relationship with Shadow Weaver, in which she’d be rewarded for her accomplishments with scratches behind her ear, but punished for her failures with both physical and emotional forms of abuse, had left her to build up a wall to protect herself that was nearly impossible to tear down. The only one who’d ever properly managed to do so was Adora and it was only because she’d met Catra so early on in her life and made such a comforting impression on her that the girl couldn’t help but allow her to take over her every thought, allow her to get past that wall.

Though, they didn’t only talk about their emotional turmoil, Catra also told Adora about her photography and how quickly she’d fallen in love with the art. Her friend from the photography club, Entrapta, had even started teaching her how to use photoshop to edit her photos, something that took her sometime to get the hang of but she ended up really enjoying, though she could only ever practice when the school computer labs were open because she couldn’t afford the software herself (she quickly warned Adora not to attempt to buy it for her because she was already working on saving up for it herself – she was only half joking, knowing full well that Adora would do anything for her, all she had to was say the word).

Adora told Catra about all the different workouts she’d started doing, all the different college teams her coach told her to consider, all the different trophies she’d collected from her games over the past few years. Needless to say, Adora was very prideful and Catra was very impressed, even if she wouldn’t admit (not that she had to, Adora could see the way Catra was checking out her biceps from a mile away).

This one time, they were sitting atop a tree, Catra had a pen in her hand, drawing and carving into bark as Adora hummed to herself mindlessly.

“What’re you drawing?”

“Nothing really, just doodling.”

“Like how you used to do on my hand?”

“Pretty much.” Catra shrugged, not looking up until she felt a hand resting on her knee. She raised a brow at Adora, who just smiled back, and she understood. She began doodling small shapes on Adora’s hand, glancing up at her every once in a while, to see her reaction to the art.

As she began to run out of space on Adora’s hand, she trailed up her wrist and then further up her arm, drawing one continuous line that had ridiculous twists and turns; Catra assumed it tickled, because Adora started to laugh.

“Hm.”

Adora stopped laughing and rose a brow at the artist, “What?”

Catra repeated, “What?”

“You said, ‘hm.’…”

“I just realized that you snort when you laugh.”

“We’ve known each other for ten years, you just noticed?”

“I’ve always known, I was just so used to it that I guess it never caught my attention,” She shrugged, still going with the line, “It’s cute. I missed it.”

Adora blushed, squeaking out a hurried, “ _Oh._ ” Catra looked up at the sound, smiling softly at her when she noticed that Adora couldn’t get herself to look Catra in the eye.

Another tough conversation they had was initiated by Catra, much to Adora’s surprise.

“I need to say something.”

Adora glanced over, “Go ahead.”

“You know when I first showed up here? And I kissed you?” Adora nodded, Catra continued, “I shouldn’t have done it.” Adora only hummed in response, and again, Catra continued, “It was selfish and stupid, and I shouldn’t have done it.”

A long moment of silence fell over them before Adora said anything.

“I really liked it.”

“So did I.”

“It was pretty selfish, though.” She glanced at her again, watching her face for a second or two.  
She swallowed down nothing, “I know.” Their eyes met. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, well…” Adora shrugged, “It happened.” She took a pause. “Would you undo it? If you could.”

Catra turned back to the clear sky, shutting her eyes. “I don’t know.”

Adora waited for a bit before saying anything else, and then, “I wouldn’t either.”

They kept talking for a long time. Nights upon nights upon nights. Some things were easier to discuss than others, for obvious reasons.

“Did you ever hate me?” Catra asked her once, while sitting against a tree. Adora was leaning against the tree opposite to her.

She bit her lip. “I wanted to.” She bit it again. “I couldn’t.”

“Okay.”

Catra talked about her art, Adora talked about the philosophy class she was taking. Catra talked about Scorpia and Entrapta, Adora talked about Bow and Glimmer. Adora talked about Light Hope and Catra…

“Hey Catra?”

“Hey Adora.”

“Um,” She bit her lip, thinking over the question for a moment, “How’s your foster mom been?” They both knew what she was really asking.

Catra cleared her throat, “She… She passed away, actually.”

Adora sat up, nearly headbutting Catra thanks to their position. Catra sat the same way she always did, propped up on her hands, legs extended out in front of her, but this time, Adora was lying down with her head on her lap. “You’re kidding.”

“Nope.”

“…You didn’t kill her, did you?” Adora was a little worried about how the joke might come across, thankfully Catra laughed.

“Nope.” She snorted, “Natural selection.”

“Since when?”

“About a month after we broke up, actually.”

“Oof.” She let out an airy laugh herself, “Guess I wasn’t the only one who felt like dying when that happened.” Her eyes went wide at what she’d just said, “Shoot, I’m so sorry, I-“

Catra’s brows were furrowed, Adora couldn’t quite place the look on her face but it somewhat resembled concern. If anyone should be concerned, it’s Adora, she just made a joke at a dead woman’s expense, she- “I’m really sorry about everything that happened between us, Adora.”

“You don’t have to apologize…” Adora tried to tell her, but Catra shook her head, her eyes were shut yet she looked kind of tense.

“I do.” She bit her lip, “And I’m sorry.”

Adora smiled, gentle, understanding. “Apology accepted.” And the tension in Catra’s face faded away. “But, uh… if she’s gone, where have you been living? Don’t tell me you’ve been alone in that house for the past two years, Catra, I swear to-“

“Calm down, will you? I’m fine, I’ve been staying over at my friend Scorpia’s place, her moms are taking pretty good care of me.” She smirked, “I have a princess friend, too, now.”

“Yeah, yeah, good for you.” Adora snorted, “Just, um… Just out of curiosity…”

“Nothing ever happened between me and her.”

Adora crossed her arms over her chest in fake offence, “What makes you think I was gonna ask that?”

“You’re the most jealous person I’ve ever met.” Catra laughed, “But seriously, you have nothing to worry about in that department.”

Adora couldn’t help but grin, “Okay, good.” She reached out, gently brushing down one of Catra’s eyebrows with her thumb, “To be honest, I’m just glad you’re safe and away from that old hag.”

“Mhm, you don’t have to worry about that anymore either…” She had a glint in her eyes as she quickly added, “Only person that’s been giving me bruises is you.” She pulled the collar of her shirt down to reveal a couple of bruises on her neck that still hadn’t completely healed.

“Catra!”

“What?” She couldn’t help her laugh as Adora tried to cover the flush of her cheeks, “You can make edgy jokes and I can’t?”

There was also this one occurrence, about a month later, that Adora could never quite stop thinking about…

They were both lying flat on their backs on the grass, Adora had her eyes shut, she was twirling a flower she’d found in between her fingers, quietly humming an indistinct tune that seemed to almost lull her to sleep. Catra was watching her intently, not daring to utter a single word lest she disturb her peace, and yet her subconscious apparently had other plans because without even a second thought, a soft mumble escaped her lips.

“God, I am still so in love with you…”

Adora’s eyes lifted open and she glanced at the other girl through the corner of her eye. It looked as though Catra hadn’t even noticed she’d said the words, until Adora responded back, “Still?”

And it dawned on them both that they’d never actually said those words to each other. Arguably, ten years of friendship, and they’d never told each other they love each other. Even during their relationship, which lasted over a year, Adora couldn’t remember ever actually saying the words aloud, at least not to Catra herself. People had said the words for them or about them, like when Bow called them ‘lovebirds’ or when Hope compared their ‘love’ to what she once had with Mara, but they’d never actually said the words to each other. It was just always implied. They loved each other, they knew that, but they never said the words, and now, for the first time, Catra had said them.

Adora’s heart felt like it was doing summersaults, it felt like it was beating straight out of her chest, it felt like it was fluttering away like a butterfly, it felt like it would stop beating and never start up again, it felt like it was doing a thousand different things at once, and she genuinely worried, for a single moment, that it was going to kill her.

But then that worry went away and it was replaced by pure bliss as she stared back at Catra, who was nodding, decidedly, without even a moment’s hesitation. “Still.”

Adora smiled and grabbed the collar of Catra’s shirt, bringing her into a passionate kiss; their last one for quite some time. After pulling away, Adora whispered against her lips, soft and airy and honest. “I love you so much.”

Out of every moment they’d ever spent together, this one always remained Adora’s favorite.

And yet, the duo decided to simply stay friends for a long while after that, easily falling back into their old routine, whilst slowly learning to be less dependent on one another for their individual happiness. Adora, who was all but dying to kiss Catra like that again, wasn’t the biggest fan of the whole ‘better yourself before jumping back into a relationship’ thing, but she complied anyway, knowing it was what was for the best. Well, she… somewhat… complied. She complied for about a month, and then the two adopted the label of ‘exes who are still into each other but are staying friends for the time being but still make out a lot’. Which Adora didn’t have any sort of issue with, and frankly, neither did Catra.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The year Adora turned eighteen was one of the best years of her life, though, funnily enough, she actually only had less than a handful of memories from that year.

“So, are you two dating again, or what?” Glimmer asked as the group of five walked into homeroom. Both Catra and Adora blushed at the invasive question. Adora’s friends had eventually come around on the idea of her and Catra someday getting back together, though it definitely took one of them (cough, glimmer, cough) a lot more convincing, and she had to actively avoid telling them about the whole ‘friends with benefits’ thing because she knew, with every fiber of her being, that they’d throw a fit over it and probably never let the two be alone together again.

“That’s what I’ve been wondering!” Scorpia exclaimed, pulling each of her pincers over Catra and Adora’s shoulders, huddling them the three of them together in a hug, before letting them go so they could take their seats in class. After Catra officially introduced Adora to her housemate, they learned that they actually had a lot in common, for instance, they both cared about Catra more than anything else in the world and… they both work out, like, way too often.

“We’re sorting some things-“

“Seriously, why don’t you just get back together?” Bow wondered, turning back in his seat to look at them, “You’re basically already a couple, I mean, look at you! You’re holding hands!” He aggressively gestured at their linked hands, causing them to subconsciously let go, instead opting to rest their hands on their respective desks. Hm, if they thought holding hands was enough to make these two a couple then they definitely shouldn’t tell them about what happened two weeks ago… Not that they were planning on doing so. Nope. That would be way more information than they’d ever be able to handle.

“Friends hold hands.” Adora shrugged, more so trying to convince herself than Bow.

“Yeah, and why don’t you worry about your own love life, Mr. been in love with his best friend for the past ten years.” Catra added, eyeing both him and Glimmer knowingly.

Scorpia squealed at the revelation, “Oh, I just knew there was something going on between you two!” Glimmer glared at the catgirl, silently scolding her for spilling the beans on her and Bow’s not-so-secret feelings for each other. “Oh, don’t worry. I’m great with secrets. I haven’t even told Adora that Catra was planning on asking her to senior pro- Uhhhhhiiiiii mean… Nothing?” Scorpia turned to shoot Catra a sheepish look, but she already had both her hands slapped against her face, truly regretting even telling the taller girl about her prom plans.

Bow, Glimmer, and Scorpia’s gazes all fell on Adora then, watching as her eyes locked on Catra and a pleased grin made its way onto her face. Catra refused to look up until they were dismissed from class, and even then she wouldn’t make eye contact with Adora (she did, however, hold quite an angry glare against Scorpia).

“So,” Adora smiled as she took Catra’s hand back into hers, silently thanking the stars that their other three friends had class on the opposite side of the building from them. “Prom?”

Catra sighed, finally meeting her gaze, “I’d appreciate it if you let me ask you somewhere a little more romantic, y’know, like anywhere other than some random hallway in our school.”

“Does it matter where you ask?” She laced their fingers together, “You know I’ll say yes.”

“Maybe so, but I had a whole thing planned and I don’t wanna have to cancel just cause Scorpia can’t be trusted with secrets.” Catra hold her eyes, making a mental note never to share another secret with the white-haired woman.

Adora smiled, pecking her cheek, “Okay, just don’t make me wait too long.” And with that, she entered her classroom, leaving Catra just a little bit flustered. It astounded her that, even after all these years, Adora had such a strong effect on her.

About a week later is when Catra finally popped the question. Adora was sitting on her desk chair, Catra was sitting on her lap, playing with her fingers and kissing her knuckles; it made her laugh a little, remembering what their friends had said last week about them basically already being a couple, but they couldn’t help it, it was so easy for them to fall back into this routine of gentle touches, kind words, soft kisses…

“Can I make a request?”

Adora smiled, kissing her cheek. “Anything you want.”

“Would you let me paint on your back?”

“On… on my back?”

“Mhm,” She brought Adora’s hand up to her lips again, softly pressing kiss after kiss to her palm, “I saw this photo online of someone doing a painting on someone else’s back, figured it might be cool.”

Adora shrugged, trying to hold in her giggles as Catra kept kissing her hand, “Fine by me, just don’t paint something inappropriate or so help me, I will-“

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, you’re all tough and threatening and prudish, I get it.” Catra laughed, getting up off Adora’s lap, “Go lay down on your stomach.” With a huff and a roll of the eyes, Adora complied. Catra glanced over as she was grabbing her paint supplies, which for some reason she still kept in Adora’s room despite not living with her overbearing foster mother anymore (she supposes she just likes having that link between Adora and her art), “You gotta take your shirt off, idiot.” Adora’s face began to heat up, eyes going wide, stammering all over the place like a Neanderthal. “Dude, c’mon, I’ve seen you shirtless, like, a bajillion times.”

“I know that.” She kept her gaze on the ground, “It’s just… it’s been a while.”

“Pretty sure I took it off you like a week ag-“

“Okay!” Adora huffed, pulling her shirt off in one swift movement, “I know, no need to remind me.”

Catra chuckled to herself, quietly mocking the blonde, “It’s been a while, she says, no need to remind me, she says.”

Adora glared at her, unamused, “I’m right here.”

“Mhm,” Catra laughed again, walking over to the bed, paints, brushes, and a palette in hand, “Lay down for me.” Adora did as told and Catra began working on the piece she had planned out in her head.

“That tickles.” Adora mumbled, chin rest on her hands, trying to hold in her giggles.

“I know, you’ve said that, like, twenty times already.” She took a second to push a strand of Adora’s hair off her shoulder, “Don’t worry, I’m almost done.”

A few minutes later, as well as a few uncontrolled fits of giggles later, Catra set her brush down and smiled down at the finished piece. “Okay, all done. You wanna see?”

“Of course.” Catra grabbed Adora’s phone off her nightstand, snapping a photo of her back before handing the phone to the blonde, who simply gasped.

Catra had painted the night sky on Adora’s back, simply decorated with the words, ‘will you go to prom with me?’ written out in stars. Well, she hoped they were stars. She truly had no idea what they actually looked like, but she designed them after how Adora had described them to her countless times.

“Holy…” Adora’s jaw dropped a little as she stared down at the photo, zooming in to get a good look at it, “You painted the stars, I…” She glanced back at Catra with the biggest smile, “They’re beautiful.”

Catra returned the smile, feeling her heart flutter, “So?”

“Of course, I’ll go to prom with you, are you kidding? You painted the freaking stars for me.” She turned over, pulling Catra in for a kiss. God, she missed this. And then their eyes went wide and their jaws dropped when they realized that Adora had just smudged all the paint, that had been on her back just a moment ago, onto her white sheets. “Oh, gosh. Hope is gonna kill me.”

“Just tell her to wait till after prom.” Catra winked before getting up to rinse her brushes.

Adora later ended up confirming with Catra that they were in fact a couple again, Catra began arguing that they’d basically been dating again for months already (ironic considering she scolded their friends for making that same point), and Adora decided to disregard that comment. Again. It was always the same old story with these two.

Prom itself was all one big blur. Most of what Adora remembered could be summarized one short sentence: Catra looked hot in a suit.

She’d picked her up wearing a burgundy two piece suit with the bowtie undone around her neck and good God, if it didn’t make Adora’s heart stop beating for a second.  
Two brief knocks at the door, and when Adora pulled it open, “Hey, Adora.”

“Oh, good God…”

Catra huffed out a laugh, smirking at the blonde, “Might wanna keep it in your pants for now, princess.” _Shoot._ She hadn’t realized she’d said that out loud. Man, Adora sure was glad they ended up deciding against carpooling with their friends to prom because if they had just witnessed that… she’d never live it down.

After spending about forty minutes at the event, Catra and Adora quickly decided that prom really wasn’t for them and they ended up leaving early, way early, and heading to their favorite diner for a bite, instead. But not before getting in at least one dance together.

“May I have this dance, princess?” Catra smiled, offering her hand to the blonde, who accepted with a grin of her own.

“That was so lame, I’m gonna hold it over you for the rest of your life.”

“Oh, Adora, did you hear that?” Catra began glancing around the ballroom, cupping a hand to her ear as they danced.

“No…” Adora looked around herself, “What?”

“It’s the sound of you not getting laid tonight.”

“Jokes on you, I’ve never gotten laid.” Adora smirked at the brunette, her smug gaze only faltering when Catra laughed right in her face.

“And whose fault is that?”

“Oh, shut up.” They danced in silence for a while after that, close yet loose, comfortable and familiar yet new and enticing. It was the most fun they’d had all night.

And then Catra dipped her, both hands resting on her lower back, keeping her steady, eyes locked on Adora’s, holding her gaze. She leaned in and kissed her, it wasn’t slow but, in the moment, it felt as though it took a millennium for their lips to meet, causing Adora’s heart to ache slightly. They pulled away, just a moment too soon, and Adora could feel Catra’s breath against her skin as she whispered, so light, so delicate, as if she was trying to preserve the moment, “I’ve missed you.”

Adora rose a brow at her but refused to break eye contact, “I’ve been here the whole time.”

Catra didn’t reply. She blinked, once, twice, a third time, chest rising and falling with each deep breath. “No, it’s different.” The corner of her mouth turned up into the smallest, briefest smile, “We’re different.”

“Good… different?”

Catra nodded once. “Good different.”

And then they were in their usual booth, in their usual diner.

“You look really pretty tonight, by the way.” Catra had told her, eyes locked on her menu.

Adora smiled, “So do you.”

“Pfft, this old thing?” Catra gestured at her outfit, “Actually, yeah, you’re right. I do look pretty hot.”

“Mhm.” Adora mumbled, allowing her gaze to linger, “You really do.”

Catra’s eyebrows raised slightly, “Okay, stop looking at me like that or I’m gonna get us kicked out of this diner.”

Adora reached out a hand, placing it on Catra’s, which was clad in a fingerless leather glove, and rubbing circles on the small window where her fur poked through. “Try me.”

Catra took a shaky breath but held eye contact, “You know what?” She swallowed hard, then turned attention back to her menu, “I’m really hungry, we should order some food, don’t ya think?”

Adora snorted, “That’s what I thought.” She pulled her hand back, noting how Catra shivered at the lack of contact, and scanned through her own menu as well.

After ordering their food, they decided to have a quick arm-wrestling match, which Adora won, fair and square, no matter how much Catra insisted that she had let her win. Then, just as she saw the waitress about to approach their table, Catra promptly jumped up and out of her side of the booth, to sit beside Adora instead, snaking an arm around her as the older woman set down their dishes. As she walked off, Catra pulled out her phone and made sure both her, Adora, and the two plates overflowing with food were in the shot before capturing the photo.

“Coulda warned me.” Adora chuckled before stealing a fry off Catra’s plate.

“Nah, it’s more fun when you have no idea it’s coming.” Then she leant in, pressed a kiss to Adora’s cheek and snapped another photo. She pulled up from her photo gallery and smiled down at it, showing it off to Adora as well before putting her phone away. “See, now that’s a good photo. I think you should make it your new icon.”

Adora laughed breathlessly, a content smile playing on her lips, “Whatever you say, my love.”

Catra’s heart skipped a beat at the nickname but she said nothing else, instead diving into her burger like she hadn’t eaten all day, which frankly, she hadn’t. She had been too busy getting ready to worry about food before now, something she hadn’t mentioned to Adora because she knew she’d tell her off for it.

“Do you think we should’ve told the guys that we were leaving?” Adora wondered, harshly tapping at the bottom of the ketchup bottle, trying to get out the last of its contents.

“Nah,” Catra shrugged, reaching over to grab the bottle from Adora, “They’d just try to convince us to stay, you know how Bow is.” She shook the bottle a couple times then tapped on it again, the way Adora had, watching as a big glob of ketchup spilled out onto Adora’s plate.

The blonde grinned at her as she set the bottle back down on the table, “Thanks,” Catra shrugged in response, shoving an especially long fry into her mouth. “And yeah, I guess you’re right… I even saw him and Scorpia starting a conga line by the punch bowl, we’re lucky we made it outta there alive.” Catra snorted, trying to compose herself before taking a sip of her soda so she wouldn’t choke.

Once they’d finished their meals, Catra asked the waitress for their check and when she fished out her wallet to pay, Adora couldn’t help but grab it from her hands, trying to get a better look at the photo in the little plastic window. It was the photo Catra had taken of Adora using Light Hope’s instant camera, all those years ago.

“Hey,” She mumbled, “That’s me.”

“Sure is.” Catra took her wallet back, pulling out a few bucks and setting them down on the little plastic tray where their bill was.

“You kept it?” Adora questioned, “Even after all this time?”

“Of course, it’s my favorite photo of you.” She shrugged, a soft smile making its way onto her lips, “One of my favorite memories, too.” The words warmed Adora’s heart, and as they stepped out of the booth, she couldn’t help but take Catra’s hand in hers, lacing their fingers together the way she had become so used to doing.

Catra walked Adora back home, wished her a goodnight and was about to turn around and leave when Adora stopped her. “Wait.”

“You okay?”

“Yeah, but…” She pouted a little, “Could you stay? You don’t have to spend the night if you don’t want to, I just… I don’t wanna say goodbye just yet.” Catra smiled up at her, and without another word, she wrapped her arm around Adora’s waist as they made their way up to her room.

Lying in Adora’s bed, arms wrapped around one another, legs tangled underneath the covers, dreamy smiles playing on both their faces, it had always been commonplace for them, even after those few years they’d spent apart. Catra couldn’t help the delicate way her fingers weaved through Adora’s hair, couldn’t help the whispered musings that escaped her lips, the sweet nothings that she whispered to her girl in the dead of the night, she couldn’t stop herself from pressing featherlight kiss after featherlight kiss to the flush of Adora’s cheek, the curl of her ear, or the small, almost insignificant wrinkle in her temple as her face slowly began to relax against the sensation of Catra’s lips against her skin. Catra had always known her girl was beautiful, but in the lowlight of the evening Adora was absolutely breathtaking. Her hushed breaths, the slight twinkle in her eye, the way the corners of her mouth turned up so gently to form a smile so fragile, so remarkable, so beautiful that Catra was afraid any sudden movement, any sudden sound would wipe it from existence forever. She made a mental note to never forget this moment, to capture this version of Adora in her mind and never let her fade.

“Can I ask you something?” Adora’s fell barely above a whisper and Catra could only sit in awe and watch the way her lips moved as she spoke.

“Mhm” She mumbled, gaze locked on Adora’s mouth, wishing and wanting more than anything to kiss her in that moment, to capture her voice, her words between both their lips.

“A long time ago,” She began, slowly letting out a breath, “I asked you if you remembered meeting me for the first time, and you said all you remembered was your first day of 2nd grade at my school.” She bit her lip and Catra observed, “Do you actually not remember that one night in the woods?”

Catra took a long pause, thinking over everything Adora had just said, analyzing the tone of her voice, the almost unbearable hopefulness, and she swallowed down the lump in her throat, “No.” She watched as Adora swiped her tongue over her bottom lip. “No, I remember.”

Adora shifted in arms, turning slightly to face her, peering up at her mismatched eyes but just barely being able to identify them in the darkness of her bedroom, “You do?”

“Mhm.” And before Adora could ask, because Catra knew she would, she continued, “I lied because I didn’t really… _want_ to remember that night.”

Adora stayed quiet, allowing Catra to take her time explaining herself, not wanting to pressure her or make her feel as though she wasn’t allowed to keep certain things to herself.

“I tried really hard to block it out of my memory cause that was the night I had tried to run away from home… and when Shadow Weaver found me, she was angrier than I had ever seen her.” She bit the inside of her cheek, willing her tears not to fall because she knew Adora would be able to see them, regardless of how little light there was in the room. “It was a really, really bad night to be her foster kid.” She tried to laugh but it came out choked and dry, even somewhat bitter.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” She carried on stroking Adora’s hair, smiling down at the beautiful blonde with everything she could muster, “Meeting you made that night worthwhile.”

“Catra, you shouldn’t-“

“I know, I know.” She nodded and a tear trickled down her cheek. She went to wipe it away but Adora’s thumb had gotten to it first, gently brushing over her fur. “I’m just really glad I met you, Adora.”

The grin on Adora’s face was unmistakable. “I’m really glad I met you, too.” Catra fell asleep soon after that moment, finding it easy to relax in Adora’s arms, listening to her steady heartbeat. Adora fell asleep later on, after whispering all the things she never thought she’d be able to say to her, and with one last “I love you” She buried her face in the tuft of fur on Catra’s chest, which was exposed by the low neckline of the tank top she’d let her borrow, feeling peaceful and safe now that she was back in her girl’s arms.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They were nineteen, and in love, and lying across the hood of a car, a car that was parked at the edge of a cliff in some random town that Catra had driven them up to.

“So nice of Scorpia to let you borrow her car.” Adora had said, leaning her head out the open window just slightly in order to get a better look at the view.

Catra had laughed, “Yeah, good thing I didn’t tell her that I never got my license.”

“You, what?!”

“Kidding! I’m kidding.” Catra had assured her, gently tapping her girlfriend’s trembling hand.

She was not kidding, but Adora didn’t need to know that.

It was the summer after Adora’s first semester of college, she had chosen to study political philosophy at the University of Mystacore, while Catra had decided to take some time off before seeking higher education; she cared about getting a degree, don’t get her wrong, but after years and years of having her free will stolen from her, she wanted nothing more than to do something reckless, something freeing, something like driving around and taking beautiful photos of beautiful things.

At the moment, the number one thing on her list was Adora.

So, when they parked the car up by the cliff, the first thing Catra did was grab her camera and follow her girlfriend out to the edge. They laid on the hood for hours, listening to some indie-rock playlist that was blasting out through the car speakers, Adora just stared up at the sky like she always did when her stars were out, admiring their beauty, whispering comments to herself about how different they looked on this side of Etheria, about how they were the most entrancing things she’d ever seen, and Catra, she just took photos of her, whispering back comments about how she thought _Adora_ was the most entrancing thing she had ever seen, and would ever see.

“You are so beautiful, you know that?” Catra mumbled, catching Adora’s attention, “You’re just so beautiful in every sense of the word. I can’t help but feel like I’m the luckiest person in the world because I have you in my life, I can’t help but feel like I’m the luckiest person in the universe because I get to love you every single day and I get to know, for sure, that you love me back. God, I just…” she shook her head, a gentle look of disbelief on her face, mixed with something else, something almost unidentifiable, “I just wanna spend the rest of my life with you.”

Adora smiled up at her, it was soft, only one corner of her mouth raised, her eyes staring at Catra so deeply, she felt she might drown. “Sounds a lot like a marriage proposal, if you ask me.” Adora laughed, Catra didn’t.

“It is.” Catra hates water, but if Adora’s eyes were pools of ocean blue, she was ready to dive in.

Adora, slightly taken back, sat up, keeping her gaze locked on Catra’s, “Are you… being serious?”

“Yes. No matter what, I know one thing will always be true, and that one thing is that I want nothing more than to spend every moment of the rest of my life with you by my side.” She smiled, so happy, so uncontrolled, so free. “Marry me, Adora.”

Adora didn’t respond, she simply snaked her arms around Catra’s neck and pulled her in for a long-awaited kiss. “Anything for you, my love.”

A minute of silence passed between them, and then, “Wait, are we gonna be one of those couples that gets married really young and then strangers on the internet make fun of them?” All she got in response was a laugh.

Moments later, when the buzzing excitement had settled down and the loudest sound around was the vibration of Catra’s content purr, she was taking photos of her girl, her fiancé, capturing her unadulterated beauty, when she heard her say something, so soft and so breathless, she thought perhaps she had imagined it.

“For years,” She started, glancing at Catra as she snapped another photo, “I told the stars about you.”

“You,” she couldn’t contain her smile, “You told them about me?” Adora nodded, looking just as content, “What’d you say?”

She turned back to face the sky, her voice carrying a certain airiness, “Everything. About the first time we met… the moment I realized how I felt about you… our first kiss. I told them that I loved you, that I wanted to spend my life with you, that I always knew you were meant for me, and that I was meant for you. I told them everything I’ve ever known about you, everything I’ve ever felt about you. It was important to me that they knew just how special you are.”

Catra set down her camera, hovering over Adora and pressing a kiss to her lips before lying down beside her on the hood of the car. She looked up to the sky, to the stars, and…

“Adora?”

“Hm?”

“I see them.”

“You see, what?”

“I see the stars.”

Adora wasn’t sure if Catra was telling the truth, she could never be truly sure, but something in her wanted to believe it was true, wanted to believe that this was the stars telling her that she’d been right all along, about her feelings, about Catra, about their relationship, about them being special… and about Catra being _her star._ So, she believed. She believed with everything she could muster, and that night, she watched as Catra looked up to the stars and told them about Adora.

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr: danisdreaming
> 
> twitter: whatarecartoons


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